My favorite part of Catholicism is all the body parts of saints in shrines and reliquaries. Fascinating

Christianity was the original soulslike

I Am ...jesus' foreskin

I mean, Blasphemous prolly didn’t exaggerate much.

Christ Largecock

It is also my understanding that Jewish tradition has the rabbis biting the foreskin off with their teeth.

Cool game! Have you played the 2nd one?

I’ve watched my wife play them both! I’ve got mobility issues in my hands that make anything more action-y than a JRPG not work out.

I'm going to end up not being able to play games eventually. My hands will fail me, my spine is cutting into my spinal cord. I hope when that happens I'll have someone to play games for me.

Sometimes, when it comes to survival horror games (which generally play a lot slower), even though I can play them, they’re much more approachable as a commentary-less playthrough on YouTube. That way, I can’t keep chickening out.

But fuuuuck, to know it’s coming, that’s particularly brutal. I hope somehow you’re given some crazy good sort of boon to compensate. You’re a good kid.

Thanks man, i appreciate that.

This comment was down voted, but it is a true, but uncommon practice.

It's all so metal

I know!!! I went to an awesome ossuary in Italy that was just all skeletons everywhere. I wonder if I could get my skeleton added after I pass.

Modern Churches are so boring and bland.

"Take this and eat, in remembrance of my foreskin."

In their defense, they were claiming to have Josh's foreskin. It was just mistranslated to Yeshua along the way, and there we are. 🤷🏽‍♂️

Of course its true. Cant have a religion without wierd ass shit to go along with it.

Pedantically, it is controversial within Christianity because the doctrine of the trinity is controversial.

Multiple denominations of Christianity reject it so they would not agree with the statement that Jesus is God.

it's enough to make a small wallet, but when you rub it, it becomes a suitcase.

oye vey.

3.58 "Eat it bitch"

What is the point you are saying is controversial? Would a divine being not have a penis?

There are "multiple" denominations of divinity-rejectors, but I think they represent a rather small minority of Christianity. Jehovah's Witnesses and who else?

Theortically possible they all owned a piece of it - I mean the dude was hung like a Gorilla, if you believe Mary Magdalene.

No, we don't have other gods or images we pray to. Those are, uhm, saints that we, uh, honor.

They are just the god's buddies. They are just his advisors.

You are thinking of Jesus not Jeezus.

...That people pray to

I love how controversial saints are in Protestant-majority Christian societies because here the idea of praying to a saint that can pray better on your behalf is absolutely banal.

I’m not particularly religious but the idea that there are different patron role models to pray to or take as an example for different aspects of life is pretty fun compared to the sterile, unrecognizable (to us) depictions of Christianity we see from other places.

Yeah of course. They are prayer multipliers.

I didn't need breakfast anyway

Different aspects and focuses just makes sense to me. I also feel like generic thanks or prayers for everything feels like a cope out and worthless. Focus

Protestants hate saints because they hate the idea that the Bible and its derivatives hold value as allegory. Having a saint of making sure your bread isn't moldy so you don't infest the village with hallucinations is far too grounded for them. If it isn't so abstract that only an insane person would believe it then what's even the point of faith?

Would a divine being not have a penis?

I think it would make more sense if they had something more in-between . Maybe Jesus just had a huge clit, like a female hyena.

There's no sense to be made anywhere in the story of Jesus, but I was wondering if one unwritten tradition (or maybe written) would be the equipmentless angels from Dogma (Alan Rickman's Metatron).

Idk, the huge clit thing is kinda thematic. It would be cool if angels could be tempted by pleasure, even create life, but doing so would be super painful.

One of my favorite comments about Jesus is, “So basically Jesus has the morality of an average woman, but he's a man so that makes him special somehow?”

Seeee, my theory explains a lot of inconsistencies about Jesus. A moralistic man from ancient Mesopotamia is just too far fetched. I need to put together a slide show for the pope so we can retcon this.

If Jesus was trans, wouldn't have leaned harder into stereotypical masculity? Maybe that's when he took up carpentry.

Maybe it's like homemade ginger beer and will just keep growing and regenerating unless explicitly stopped.

Jesus gets pregnant through sounding and gives birth through his dick. 10/10 interpretation. Make this canon.

Snip, miraculous heal, snip, miraculous heal, etc

They do like souls

There was an episode of the radio drama Adventures in Odessey about scientists/explorers finding the body of Jesus. Proving that he didn't raise form the dead. About how a discovery like that would completely change the world.

Was actually a religious show that started the dominion effect of me leaving the church.

I have been trying to present my hypothesis to the pope, but the fucking swiss dudes won't let me near him with my presentation board.

I was thinking more of an intersex situation.

Could be! Happy reading.

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/the-eight-genders-in-the-talmud/

rabbis also had a tradition that the first human being was both male and female.

These rabbis have obviously been reading my sub stack and have been stealing my ideas. They will be hearing from my lawyer.

I'm not a Christian, but I was raised protestant.

My understanding is that praying to anyone or anything besides God (or Jesus since they're one in the same) was blasphemous.

Which makes sense to me given what I know about Yahweh and his petty jealousy.

Control. The point is control.

I'm willing to spot them the difference.

"This is a regular dude who got to do a modicum of humorous magic for proselytizing, then died in a really fucked-up way. You should ask him to put in a good word with J-dawg about fishing, mycology, or testicular torsion."