I was gifted this ~2010 Toshiba Portégé. Surprisingly small and thin for its age. I was hoping to revive it, but it has only 1GB of memory ootb.

Apparently it can be upgraded up to 5GB with one spare slot that currently sits empty.

I found 2 physically compatible identical 2GB modules but no matter which one I plug in, when I start the computer it just starts the fan on highest setting and nothing else happens.

Before I go into any more detail, I found this info online:

The Toshiba Portege R600 Laptop takes the PC2-6400 DDR2-800 200pin SDRAM SODIMM memory type

My sticks look like this:

Are they compatible to PC2-6400 DDR2-800 200pin SDRAM SODIMM? I honestly can't tell.

I read the manual which says the modules need to be "Toshiba approved" but it does not say which/what Toshiba approves.

Plus this, which I did follow (note the negative):

Do not try to install or remove a memory module under the following conditions.

a. The computer is turned on.
b. The computer was shut down in either Sleep or Hibernation Mode.
c. Wake-up on LAN is enabled.
d. Wake-up on Wireless LAN is enabled.
e. The wireless communication switch is turned on.

And this does not happen:

If you install a memory module that is not compatible with the computer, the Power indicator will flash (on for 0.5 seconds, off for 0.5 seconds) in the following way;
■ If there is an error: repeatedly flashes orange twice, then white or green once

The power indicator ⏻ stays white all the time and does not blink.

TIA

Try it with one, see if it boots.

If it does, check bios, see if you need to enable dual channel.

If it doesn't, try the other 2gb and repeat.

If neither works, put the 1 GB in and check BIOS settings

You can't assume bios is normal, someone may have changed shit, they may have no idea what they were doing

How long did you wait? Give it like 15 minutes

My guess from that label is that the modules you have are rated for the lower 666 MT/s data rate (so "6400" is marketing lies), your laptop is trying to drive them at 800 MT/s, and they're failing. I wonder if they are close enough to success for the computer to try to use them (maybe they claim internally to be compliant?) but not close enough for it to work.

You don't get a boot screen or the opportunity to get into BIOS settings or anything, right?

You don’t get a boot screen or the opportunity to get into BIOS settings or anything, right?

Nothing. Black screen, usual keys do nothing, fan on high.

Try it with one, see if it boots.

I did, both, as per my post.

If it does, check bios, see if you need to enable dual channel.

The BIOS seems to lack some capabilities. I suspect some stuff is only accessible via installed software, but I already zeroed out the hd...

If neither works, put the 1 GB in and check BIOS settings

that one's soldered on

OK that I didn't try yet. Will report back.

that one’s soldered on

Jesus...

So your booting with 1GB soldered permanently in one slot...

A random 2 GB in the other slot...

And you don't understand why it's not working?

Even if I did still want to put the time in, you're not going to understand this.

with 1GB soldered permanently in one slot

Not in a slot. It's what the device came pre-installed with, and it's not removable.

The other one is not random but something that should be compatible, and anyhow, that is how you upgrade RAM in laptops, if they have a slot for that.

I waited for half an hour, nothing happened.

I scoured the internet for a BIOS upgrade but what little I found might or might not be the right file, and flashing it is not a trivial task (no Windows!).

It runs something called ACPI BIOS 3.20, and it is impossible to find it under that name.

It does run acceptably on AntiX though, fwiw.