Please.
Please please please.
A fat oompa-loompa's obituary on the front page of every newspaper on earth.
I gaze upon you, Golden Potato, with hopeless, empty eyes...
Please.
Please.

All glory to the hypnotato... of luck!

Potato recognizes potato 🥔

Don't need it

All hail the potato

Seconded. All hail potato, bringer of good news

Maybeeeeeeee

Is this like those email chains from the 2000s era when they say things like "forward this to everyone in your contacts for good luck" and then spend 5 paragraphs telling you about all the horrendous and grotesque things that will befall you if you don't forward it to everyone in your contacts?

Oh glorious potato of power, lend unto me your wisdom and starch.

Get the peeler out guys.

I prefer to pronounce it potato myself, but you do you.

DJT RIP?

I am a potato believer, I am here to save your skin.

How can I help.

All prayers to the god of starch will be answered.

Your prayers have been aknowledged, please pay the fee to DJTdeathfund@gov.us

As a senior galactic acolite and close member of the potato family, we aknowledge your prayers.

It's Hullo potato. you got both wrong duh.

Potato will love you

I saw you post and it gave me hope, this is your good news moment.

I see a newt in that potato, you lie.

Or maybe I drank too much.

Still see a newt

can I make a baked potato outta it?

Tuber acknowledged

I knew it!

Nice

The original pre-Internet chain letters were even better. Some promised good fortune of you continued the chain, and horrible consequences if you didn't, but often they were money making schemes. You would receive a list of names, and you would send a dime, or a dollar, to the name at the top of the list, remove that name, and put your own at the bottom. If everyone stuck with the chain, and sent the money, then eventually your name would rise to the top of the list, and money would start pouring into your mailbox. Theoretically.

Most states made them illegal.

Or after, if I recall.

Latvian-jokes-2013.gif

i REALLY need this

Woah, hey, are we adding potatoes into the usual Lemmy corn/beans mix?

Is that... Allowed? Will I get defederated?

Hmmm now where’s my spud cannon of luck…?

This much

You're not fooling me. That's a gilded trump potato. You can tell by the gild.

i just want to hear from her again :(

Can I shove the potato of luck up my ass?

I like good news, it's good!

🥔

[[BSHOT]]ato acknowledged

[[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]]

The sight of the potato of luck fills you with determination.

!potatoism@lemmy.world

I

JUST NEED

THAT LITTLE,

[[POTATO]]

Y O U HAVE

Only if you want to.

Thank U Mr potate

Better results than I ever got from Catholicism......