So, The Fifa Awards

A conspiracy theorist dies and goes to heaven. It's explained to him that everyone gets to speak with god after they arrive to make them feel at home and answer any questions they may have.

So when god welcomes him and he starts asking him questions, god immediately interrups him and says that, as he is all knowing, he already knows what the guy's going to ask him and the answer is no to everything: there's no Illuminati; lizard aliens; 9/11 wasn't an inside job; etc. etc. ...

So the guy thanks him and shakes his hand, but as soon as he turns around and starts walking away he slowly shakes his head and thinks to himself: "this goes even deeper than I thought!"

We should have this only the winner is the best conspiracy theory proven true. It would be a tough race this year with the Epstein files and all.

The books on paranoia? They’re right behind you.