[alt text: a satirical press release by "ANTIFA TM". The press release reads: "Attn: FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE! 09/18/2025. Comrades and Shareholders: I am pleased to announce that after months of fierce negotiations with the Trump administration, we have finally reached an agreement. ANTIFA TM has agreed that it will end all of its American operations, shutter its regional offices across the nation, and liquidate all holdings no more than 3 business days following the completion of the united states government's agreed upon contractual obligations. Those obligations are listed below:
-Release the Epstein Files"

At the bottom of the press release, there are two signatures:
"Comrade George Soros, CEO, Antifa TM Enterprises LLC."
"President Donald Trump, United States of America (copyright)"]