My wife and i kind of just fell into set tasks that we dont mind doing, but the other person hates. For example, i hate emptying the dishwasher, but i dont mind filling it. She does all the laundry, i do all the bathroom cleaning.

Cutely fitting.
I was referencing Ace as in asexual.

Being "Ace Venture, Cute math Detective".... Fits

A Cute Engels?

You're right - you can't expect it to last forever. You gotta maintain! Keep the fire burning! Keep flirting, keep finding ways to make them happy!

But we also have a friend couple that did get divorced, and still hang out regularly on very good terms.

Some people are just better as friends than lovers and I think that's awesome if they can figure that out before doing irreparable damage to said friendship.

My wife enjoys cooking, I don’t really like it.

My wife hates doing dishes, but I find it a nice excuse to listen to a podcast while doing something menial.

You can't do that, 99% of old memes rely on people despising their spouse!

I saw this from another angle a while ago. Speaking to a group of women at work and mentioned I do pretty much all the cooking at home. One of them asked what I make and I got the impression she doubted my ability, she is older and perhaps basing this off her own husband.

So I listed some weekday meals I typically make, made a point that it is all stuff I make after work too because someone had mentioned not having the time to cook.

Sourdough pizza, egg fried rice and lemon chicken, toad in the hole, pie with roast potatoes and gravy. Then sometimes if we want a pudding I sometimes make rice pudding, or steamed sponge like a jam roly poly or spotted dick.

Has got to be better than carrot cake.

Yeah, like when I call my coworker a pizza shit

My spouse set up individual tubs for each person's clothes to be put in after the dryer (including tubs for blankets and towels).

Very organized, but the entire laundry room floor is covered in these individual tubs.

I fold things as soon as I take them out of the dryer so I can avoid the tubs.

As one of the ancient poets once said

How can we be loves if we can’t be friends?

• Michael Bolton, 1989

Hot take: venting about the person you live with doesn't mean you'll be venting about people you hang out with occasionally.

But it would be good to discuss your issues with the person face to face, regardless if it's a friend, roommate, or spouse.

I don't necessarily agree with you, but I'm all about upvoting snark.

Lots of people have good marriages where things work out, their relationship needs are met, and life circumstances don't put them in survival mode.

But 1/3 to 1/2 of marriages in the US (as an example) end in divorce. Doubt any of these couples got married thinking they were going to divorce.

One day things are fine and the next day you find out the love of your life has unapologetically put you in 6 figures of debt and you're trying to figure out how to hold it all together. Life do be like that.

Same here

After a few beers I usually just try to hold back the question why they're even together with their wife, if they're so unhappy with her

I do get, that some people just need to vent, but I don't have anything bad to say about my wife.
She loves this piece of shit, that I am. In my eyes she is an absolute saint

All I had to do was ruin a few articles of her clothing and I was off the job. I was truly trying to be helpful, but the blowback was real. I still do my own, however.

Basically Chicago style?

I dated a guy for 13 years, when we finally broke up we were still going to events together!

She was interacting with redditors and twitter people for a bit. convinced the entire internet was those sorts of people.

Please don't be alarmed, but I am finding out where you live and coming round for my tea.

LOL that would be hilarious in my friend circle. Thanks for being so sincere but that kind of response would have us rolling. And a couple of Fuck you's thrown in at the same time.

My wife and I are basically attached at the hip. She’s my best friend and we do so much to support each other on all fronts.

Meanwhile in our friend circles, it’s the total opposite. People that are clearly with the wrong partners but refuse to change or grow; one that continues chasing a relationship they’ve admitted is toxic for them; couples that are married out of what seems like trauma alone or they’ve simply drifted due to never communicating; a few with the weird “wife bad lol” boomer mentality; a now-acquaintance that used to always give everyone unsolicited advice, has now started expressing misogynistic views after being perpetually single. Just no capacity for introspection and self-reflection.

My wife and I are by no means perfect, but we are open with each other, we cheer each other on, and we talk through things that bug us. The building blocks are simple but some folks refuse to adhere to them, while constantly wondering what went wrong.

Women have always been the strongest leaders throughout my life. My wife is my world and I personally think that women make better leaders. I’ve never been interested in any of the dumb humor and thought tropes that come out of male circles about women, even dating back to high school. All of that shit has always felt weird and makes me lose respect for the men that lean on that kind of lazy punch-down humor.

I don't think that's what the comic in the OP is referencing.

Certainly not what I was referencing.

Hotter take: If they stay with someone they can't talk to about their problems with, they're going to have other flaws as well. A healthy functioning adult is not gonna be in that kind of relationship, or stay in it either

German festival every November in Bew Braunfels, Texas

Oh man, I was expecting a town in Germany and nearly broke my brain trying to pronounce "Bew Braunfels" in German.

Then I read the "Texas". 😅

I don't think that's a hot take, I think that's a perfectly reasonable take.

You said

If your friends trash-talk their partner behind their back, guess what they say about you behind yours.

I responded to argue that this wasn't the case, and that some people complain about their live in partner but don't complain about their non live in friends.

Stack several of your favourite pizzas on top of each other while they're still piping hot, so the cheese sticks them together, frost with your preferred sauce, or leave uncoated it preferred, cut in to wedges and tuck in like you're at a 5 year old's birthday party.

I reckon it'd be pretty good, but very filling.

As someone who used to do room inspections: this is 100% true, and you'd sometimes be surprised with which rooms were hardly cleaned.

I thought he was a no-talent ass-clown!

I always found that so difficult to grasp, too. Even if you're splitting responsibilities, so that one person does the dayjob and the other does the household, hell, even if you've decided to be a terrible partner, how do you never think to yourself:

• "I need some space on this table, let me just put away a few things." or
• "I'd like this one specific meal that I have in mind, I'll try to prepare it."

???

First sentence sounded a lot like weaponized incompetence. 😅

It's the "Ain't it Awful" game. Just tell them he has a small dick and they'll concede. It works twofold: they'll feel sorry for you, and you won't have to worry that they'll try to fuck him.

The bar for "decently responsible and kind man" seems incredibly low.

Love this perspective and I feel a lot of the same

My wife and I are at the bar patio right now playing board games.

I'd like to propose that it's not an erotic angle, but a romantic one!

I know for many it's probably the same thing, but to me there's a clear difference between a close friend who you also have sex with and a romantic partner

IKR? I was accused of that, but it was honestly unintentional even if the results were not entirely undesirable...

Laundry go in machine come out wet. Put in next machine, come out dry. It was a while ago and I have since learned there is nuance with fabrics/temps/hang dry, etc. I still do just my own laundry as the lesson is not forgotten, but I am also approved for general sheets and towels duty. You do what you will with the original information!

Often times it's damn near on the ground but don't worry, there's guys that still bring a shovel

If i interact with redditor and twitter(twitteror?) i'd think the same too. If i went on Thread i will want to shut down the whole internet.

I know what I said.

I know what you said.

You aren't clocking the situation correctly.

Your partner getting on your nerves and you going to a therapist or a trusted friend to vent and/or get critical feedback is one thing.

Getting into a circle of people who are griping about about their parter, especially when they twist your arm to join in the trash-talking, is another thing entirely. But even in a one-on-one situation, someone who trashes their partner (implying habituality), isn't someone to trust with sensitive information. It's a particularly cruel kind of gossiping, which you should also avoid. Because guess what happens when you talk to a gossip? They pry information out of you and spread it around.

Also note that I said "trash-talking" where you said "venting."

Different situations.

Open, honest communication is the foundation for ANY healthy long term relationship. Spousal, friendship, family, all of it. It genuinely baffles me how many people don't seem to get what that means. It doesn't mean you need to be perfect. It means you need to approach tension in your relationship in good faith and with intent to fix it as a team, not as an excuse to shirk responsibility and blame others. Even if it isn't your fault. Blame itself does not offer solutions.

As a 100% polyamorous person, most folks first instinct is to ask me how I can manage it without getting jealous and are shocked to hear that, if anything, I feel orders of magnitude less jealousy than I would in an exclusive relationship. The problems they usually cite are problems that would be just as bad if not worse with monogamy, as evidenced by how many peoe cheat in monogamy. Their gut reaction is to imagine it as some sort of cuckold/cuckuean humiliation ritual when it really just comes down to the fact that I'm not perfect, I accept that fact and I want the ones I love to maximize the love they feel by seeking what I can't provide from others. It's such a burden off my chest. I can love my wife in the ways I do best and just be happy with that.

I kinda lost track what I was talking about I'm a bit sleep deprived. But I'm happy you and your wife are flourishing and I hope any changes to come only serve to strengthen that 💚🐿️

Does it count as a punchline when it's a fairly played out trope at this point?

Idk why this is being downvoted.

Like her comics or not - that's on you - the reality is that people that criticize them are called incel misogynists, and god forbid you make state that on any of the comic subs (they'll nuke your account).

She's not. She's saying something positive about a man. But more broadly saying men are incompetent & acknowledging the exceptions.

Baby steps.

I'm getting this vibe too.

Some people are just better as friends than lovers

Mrs. Doubttfure taught me that same lesson!

If they spent 5 minutes stating all the issues they're having and then asked about my relationship - I wouldn't look at them like an alien and start talking about great my partner is.

I would probably mention something inoffensive that annoyed me or talk about something going to happen ("We're headed to LA in a few weeks") just to change the subject. I certainly wouldn't start stating all the great things about my partner because that's just social incompetence in that context.

I am a big fan of weekday risotto since learning you don't actually have to stir it if you have a good sealing dutch oven or pressure cooker and short grain rice.