Maybe I could be a Christian after all

The impact cracked the then 20-year-old’s skull, causing a traumatic brain injury.

Fox News is like, "brain damage?! Bring him on!!"

Seriously, how dumb are Americans? It astounds me daily for some reason. How convenient that "heaven" is just like that fantasy novel that you've internalized and convinced yourself is actual history? I'll file this with the people that have conversations with god

Mustang Sally.

Yep there's a deliberate effort to train people into hateful Nazi fucks and get them to accept violence and cruelty. And it needs to be treated like the terrorist movement it is.

Jules: You read the Bible, Brett?

Brett: Yes.

Jules: Well, there's this passage I got memorized, sorta fits the occasion. Ezekiel 23:20:

There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

Someone with brain damage is a few steps above their usual guests

Most of them want to watch their wife get railed by black Jesus

Specifically evangelical Christians. It’s a very tricky thing to navigate because on the one hand we are taught absolute biblical inerrancy, but it’s crucial to redefine a lot of Christ’s message that gets leveraged by people with actual humanity, because a lot of it can be made to sound, well, awfully socialist.

So I think there is a deliberate, if not coordinated and conspiratorial, effort to thread that needle. AI is also a really potent vector for this. Evangelical Christians are simultaneously 3 things:

1. Completely devoted to scripture as the perfect and inerrant word of god
2. largely unfamiliar with scripture itself - the bible is perfect but it’s more of a cookbook than a manual, much less a library.
3. Weirdly open to God speaking and working in all kinds of ineffable ways, even if the resulting doctrines contradict the scripture they aren’t familiar with anyway - such as God “clarifying misinterpretation“ through AI, or through the ramblings of someone with a traumatic brain injury.

Here is the trick - I remember understanding the rhetorical genius of it when I first heard it, even before I deconstructed:

God’s word is inerrant - our understanding of it is not.

It might sound tinfoil hatted, but I think this is a lever actively being pulled by the Epstein class.

if christianity rebranded jesus to be an extremely male and extremely verile free-roaming horse I would have to seriously rethink my atheism.

Well somebody is suppressing their sexuality.

Mustang, so a horse?

That's just Sylvester Stallone circa 2010

Sounds homoerotic, but OK.

Maybe "heaven" was spending 18 days with a Latin American lover called Jesus.

Wouldn't be surprised at this point if he hallucinated a fancy Ford.

It was just mormon Jesus. Nothing special. No eye lasers.

True, although a smelly one if it was described as chock full of testosterone.

Great. Now the FBI is going to raid Heaven.

Discreet is basically always code for I'm cheating on my wife.

*Yiffy

This was eye opening. I mean, it didn't hurt. It did go in my eye but that's how I read. I mean to say that everything went into my right eye, the donkey cock, the emissions. But not like that.

Aww the eye lasers are the best part.

Why did he get a platform lol

Its always been that way. Satan has blinded you from the truth. /s

He must be Dothraki. He met "the stallion who mounts the world".

That's just Jason Momoa.

[intensely takes a look at Zarobi]

Hold on this might take a while.

6ft isn't even particularly tall in the USA

'6ft but as tall as eternity’ and a ‘Mustang full of testosterone’

We routinely get tales of NDEs and the ones that reflect (modern interpretations of) Christian Heaven get a lot of sponsorship, so this is not a novel news story.

But the above hagiographic and Hegsethian description drives the hypothesis that only imagination and personal bias inform NDE experiences.

Wait a minute, I spent 20 days in heaven and jesus was a short Chinese guy with glasses who was nervous around women. This guy is lying.

Why this is published? Today the more nonsesnse you say, the more chance to go public. Like "God exist" or "I was in Heaven" or "Jesus died and resurected" or "God tell me stories and I write them".

"...and on the 8th day, he doth roided up".

This is not meant to be criticism, but I think this guy has been repressing something for a long time...

🤣

nowadays I think it's more likely fetterman

His love for horses, Hispanic first names, and human biology?

I suspect this guy went on a drug bender and fucked a donkey.

Then he woke up on sticky sheets.

His schwantz should be hanging below the loincloth.

I bet it emits rainbow-patterned exhaust fumes.

A stable genius!

He'll tell him to pray in there too.

Grower not a show-er; you must have faith

It's "Schwanz", without the T.

i thought he looked like this

You are both wrong. My version of Jesus is right. Which means you’re both evil and are going to hell.

When you carry your cross so much you get hench one punch man style.