I ended up thinking a little about environmentalism today.

This frustrates me immensely. Specifically, I'm frustrated by having to rely on others for so much; not on principle, of course -- I think it's great for people to rely on their neighbours -- but because others do things that hurt the environment.

I see myself living in a cabin by the sea. A simply life. A hard life, but simple, and satisfying; but then I get sick and want to use modern medicine; or I think of the fishing rod I use and the fishing line; I think of the bike tires and the bike frame and the bike seat; I think of how the clothes I wear are made... So much, so much using fossil fuels, using too much of them. So much extraction, ceaseless, reckless extraction.

How can I live in a world filled with people set on wrecking it? My own self-preservation compels me to seek this excess, in certain cases. Convenience, to an extent, demands it. Of course, everything has its limits...

I wrote in my diary today that the impact shouldn't be disproportionate. I should live my life, yes, stepping on things as they are in my way, but only so far as I need to to advance. As long as I walk a righteous path, then I have a right to clear it.

It's a comforting thought, a soothing philosophy. I have the burden to finding that righteous path, but then I have the right to pursue it.

I feel insane.

I wore my brown suit, today.