Gol darn deer always eating my hostas and tomatoes and daisies and strawberries and beans and geraniums and petunias and is there a goddamn thing that deer won't eat

You could try to distract them with oats and corn but they'll probably just bring their friends.

is there a goddamn thing deer won't eat

Ass

My neighbors host a veritable wildlife buffet in their garden. They regularly have geese, ducks, turkeys, and, of course, deer. There's about 20 bird feeders plus corn, peanuts, fruit/veggie scraps, etc.

The deer still eat my plants. Gotta get the fresh greens, I guess.

I have a trail cam video of one deer eating the entrails of another deer that I shot. He ate that ass.

Also: I like this guy's green door but he's a fucking prick. One time he yelled at me for letting my dog pee in his yard. Fuck you green door guy.

Also also: the deer peed in his yard as I drove away

Ehhh entrails is ass adjacent, but not really ass. Also, I hope they were just entrails from you processing the meat, and not, like, an entire carcass you wasted

The national parks were able to prevent overgrazing by introducing wolves, have you considered that as an option? /joke

Yeah, I harvested the meat. When I field dress a deer, I take out everything from the trachea to the rectum (literal asshole included). Heart and liver are edible if healthy and intact, everything else is left for scavengers.

Yes, my proposal was not popular at city council. I am the man who cried deer

bring back wolves

One time he yelled at me for letting my dog pee in his yard.

That makes you a prick, not him.

I love deers. Wouldn’t a fence solve that issue?

Absolutely not. Deer can easily jump over a six foot fence.