Why is trump telling them how to do their job? Surely it's someone's job to know how to do this kind of thing.

When your ego is that big, under no circumstances are you allowed to lose. Inject bleach in your veins if you must.

Plus he's a real estate guy, so he probably figured (if we generously assume even a modicum of self awareness) that if he could do anything right, it's something like this. Which makes it especially funny that it backfired in minutes.

Chomp chomp

Keep it green and memorialize it as Trump Swamp.

damn. they beat me to it. i was gonna make a gif of the toilets at the office flushing green to blue.

“He kept pointing into the toilet,” said one source. “He was extremely proud of the color. He kept saying, ‘Look at that. That’s presidential blue. That’s what success looks like.’”

🤣😂🤣

An extremely dumb down metaphor of all the FAFO Trump shit and im glad it's making waves.

We should sample the algae bloom in that pool and look for intelligent life.

The onion just does regular news now.

I am NOT about to inject bleach into my veins.
However, I might stick a light bulb up my ass..

Good to know America is in such great shape that the CEO has time for things like making a pool more blue, when he's not watching himself on television.

It is rather difficult to write about political satire these days. Perhaps there is an audience for fictional news where everything is basically a utopia. Headlines like “Fossil fuel end complete, planet in remission” or “Universal healthcare announced in USA, basic income next week” or “Successful purge of billionaires creates peace on earth overnight”

Nah, this is OP's AI slop rag. Don't compare it to the writers of the onion

You should still do it. This is AI slop, so nothing of value here.

That's even more depressing

It’s funny how this chuckles guy is so pissed after starting shit and getting their name in a bunch of articles on that site.

Don't eat the onion. It may after all come to this.

Articles like this are insidious, because you can never be certain. Not absolutely

He already beat me. “Vandalism”