by Kayla's Artwork aka virtualmartyr

I never asked god, but I did try to make a deal with the devil. But as they say pray in one hand and shit in the other and see which fills up first.

They say WHAT?!!!!

They say PRAY IN ONE HAND AND SHIT IN THE OTHER AND SEE WHICH ONE FILLS UP FIRST

Wow, memory unlocked of crying so hard and begging God to take away my sinful queerness.

Didn't work.

This hit hard. And reminded me of the fact that memes actually can have cultural and historical value.

And yet, all it took was clicking a silly button on a silly website.

Who is they? I want to know where the phrase is from

If that asshole made us this way, then he wants it for us (probably has a sick sense of humor and enjoys giving us dysphoria)

Praying to God and making a deal with the Devil are pretty much the same thing.

Curiously, if you ask fundamentalist churches (and most mainline ones) the Devil is more LGBT+ friendly, and more pro-women.

The satanic church in the US is the more LGBTQI+ accepting Christian church in the country

Yeah. I imagine if god(s) exist, they're either psychopathic, or utterly incompetent. But since I'm an atheist, my view is that it's just "shit happens".

I think I first heard it from the movie Bad Santa.

I bowed to cishet normativity and well that didn't go well and so here I am straight as a fiddle

Growing up in the southern US — just about every old person I know says “want in one hand, shit in the other. See which fills up faster” so this is just a slight variation on that phrase.

I'm of two minds about why god would make people like us. Though bear in mind im not at all a believer.

I think about the movie Robin Hood Prince of Thieves. Theres a scene where a kid asks the one black guy if god made him black, and why. The response was, "Allah loves wonderous variety."

On the other hand I think in a well run universe an intelligent species with a genetic binary sex expression would be hard coded to gender expression. Since it isnt I can only conclude that god is lazy and indifferent.

On the other other hand I think dysphoria is a result of social pressure to enforce gender coding on children from birth. And traditional god fearing family structures force it hardest.

If God was real, I'd be one of his biggest haters

Makes sense why I've never heard it

I understood that reference!

For anyone who doesn't know, here's aforementioned silly button.

Out of curiosity, is there also one for other queer identities?

There's a "related" section on turnmeintoagirl.com:

Related Work and Alternate Versions

• Turn Me Into A Boy by Winter
• Turn Me Into A Guy by Jamey
• Turn Me Into A Non-Binary Person by Marcy

Also have a look at
amitrans.org to check if you're trans. Just in case.

Well I'm happy to be this way, can't complain about that part

It's not that bad, just inconvenient. I do appreciate how it's given me a unique perspective on many things and helped me figure out things I wouldn't have otherwise. However, on top of the bigotry that's only gotten worse since I came out, I also needed to put in a lot of effort to reach the baseline mood that others have by default. The years I spent discovering and figuring out how to deal with my dysphoria severely impacted my academic career. I probably lost half a decade as a result, and most of it was unavoidable, as I really couldn't have figured things out more quickly.

Wait... so which is the original? turnmeintoagirl.com or turn-me-into-a-girl.com?

I, umm.. Thought that were identical? I think originally the original original was the one with hyphens, which is why the references versions also copied that choice, but that's just a guess, I didn't look it up. [Update: yeah both domains are identical. Note: the banner-text at the top is ransom on every visit]

Not to be confused with turnintoagirl.com which claims to be a modern adaptation. But I don't see how it's better than the original, also the "for the low price of $0!" and "This text is protected by quantum encryption, only girls can read it" humor kinda makes it... toooo ridiculous. Whereas from a users perspective this is supposed to be fun, but also very very serious. These button sites are literally life changing serious business. They shouldn't ruin 💖the magic💖 by making too much fun of themselves. Damn, I could've spend all this time ranting to instead just look up a sourced answer to your original question 😭

Don't worry you're fine lol; I enjoyed your rant <3

δημιουργός

Someone once asked what I'd do if I met god and I said I'd demand to know what the fuck its problem is.

To be precise, it is The Satanic Temple, not to be confused with the Church of Satan.
They do a lot for civil rights in the US