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The original was posted on /r/nosleep by /u/fella_that_is_orange on 2026-08-11 01:24:41+00:00.

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Some years ago I worked at a small law firm, I worked in the mail room. Knowing nothing about law or even really caring, I just needed a paycheck. There was only one person who I gave half a shit about, a woman named Julia. She worked as a paralegal and would often spend her days shifting through case files next to me as I filtered the post. At first I assumed it was just for the quiet but when she once stopped and asked me, "Do you hate talking while you work or something?"

I looked up with a soft grunt of surprise. She was so beautiful, long orange hair, so many freckles that the sun would explode before you'd count them all. Taller than myself and so, so smart. "What?" I replied, sliding a small letter into the wrong hole.

"You chat at lunch, so I wanna keep the convo going and then you're" she gestured with open palms, "a mute." She giggled as I turned bright red. In all honesty I never noticed that she enjoyed hearing me. Normally I was talking to Glenn, the handyman.

I smiled at her and shrugged, "I assumed you were too busy," I pointed with a folder to the back door, "everyone out there is."

She shrugged in return and clapped her pen into the table, a little harder than she expected. "Never too busy for you, Danny." Soon afterwards we began dating. Despite her flirting. she was actually extremely busy. Our dates consisted of her bringing the fanciest takeaway she could muster to the mailroom or her coming to my house and us watching old cartoons. One morning the mailroom door flung open, standing panting like an angry dog, slobber almost cresting her lips was Frankie.

Frankie was the granddaughter of the man who opened the law firm. She was stuck-up, aggressive and practically useless at her job. She spoke like a smoker with a woodchipper for a throat. "Danny," she hissed, waving a worn sheet of paper around, "Any fucking clue what this is, hm?"

"No, miss," I replied, standing with surprise.

"This here, is an invite, an invite for a workplace camping exercise," as she waved it a tear in the corner grew ever so slightly longer, "and it was meant for law workers specifically."

"And a few executives," Julia added without looking up. I just nodded, having been told about this before.

"Exactly right, Julia. So my question is, how the fuck did it end up on Glenn's desk?"

"Did you guys send one to Glenn by mistake?" I asked, nervously approaching to look at the sheet.

"No, dipshit, I didn't. The letter was addressed to Brian P, but you sent it to the fucking handyman!"

"I apologize, I'll get to him immediately."

Frankie kicked the doorframe, "No, Danny, you won't. This whole situation has been a great fucking mess. We took it from Glenn and he made a fuss, 'why not me? why not me?' And guess what, Danny? HR agreed it was unfair, so now we either cancel or we invite everyone, which means you too!"

After more heated back and forth, me trying to defend myself, Julia jumping to my side and Frankie screaming like a banshee. I agreed to join and it was set. Two weeks later we set off. They hired a bus, cheaped out on it too. Rusted old thing, wobbled in strong winds. The driver was a greasy woman that spat multiple times onto the floor. The trip was meant to build morale but a law firm not taking cases for a full weekend was moronic. So not everyone went. Those who did were, Frankie, Julia, Glenn, Brain P a lawyer, Brain C another paralegal and June, technically a marketer, though nobody knew her real job.

Julia, Glenn and I sat in the back, our bags placed on seats. Glenn was an older fella, moustache to rival Tom Selleck's and incredibly muscular for his age. He took the most for the trip, his own personal tent, flashlight's and so much food you would assume it's the end of the world. We joked amongst ourselves and barely listened as Frankie prattled on about safety, friendship and other pointless mumbo-jumbo. After she was done talking she slid herself in beside June, who was using an iPhone to note down Frankie's speech. "Oh it was wonderful," the young lady replied, tapping away at the glass. In front of them were the Brians, P and C, inseparable. P was a giant fella, fat with muscle underneath. Once he got the shell of a small car in as evidence and actually brought it into the courtroom himself. C was much thinner but twice as annoying as everyone else. The whole front resented me, treated me like I was below them. In most ways I was.

We pulled into the campsite, a dingy place with no name. The driver hollered for us to get the fuck out and so we did. Standing like soldiers in the dirt, our lifeline peeling away back onto the highway. Frankie clapped and turned to us, "Team! We had to hire a cabin legally to stay here but there are no rules as to where we set up our tents," I later came to find out this was a complete lie. A lie that ultimately doomed us. "I'll get the key but you guys head out down the path, there's an opening next to a waterfall I saw on the website, we'll be there." As I went to turn and walk I heard Frankie clear her throat, "Danny, you didn't get the letter, remember?" I nodded, "No phones, darl!"

"I don't reckon that's much fair," Glenn replied, "they didn't know."

"Glenn, please," Frankie hissed, "they know now," she beckoned with her open palm, "phone, please."

I gave it off and watched her plop it into a large sack that clacked as it collided roughly with the others. June went to drop the iPhone in and Frankie waved her away with the others. P sucked air through his teeth, "Well, this place sucks."

C slapped P's already sweaty back, "Nah, son, this is it, the real deal. Just hope my bitch back at my place doesn't think I'm cheating." He bounced his eyebrows at June, "Not out of the question though."

June smiled awkwardly and Glenn whacked C around the back of the head with his meaty palm, "Fucking, child." After a small yelling match, subdued by Julia begging them to stop we continued deeper into the forest. What path there was slowly petered out until there was nothing left and we ended up slugging our gear through tightly packed trees. Small animals scuttled about, bush mice and spiders. I hated it all and I wished Frankie gave me the option not to go.

As we reached a more open area, Julia and I heard something strange. She clenched my hand in hers and we stood briefly as the other trudged on. Dragging, the sound of something heavy pushing leaves and sticks. Then, crying, soft sniffles. Luckily it was disappearing away from us but it was distinct. A crying man, trudging through the woods. "What's wrong, you two?" Glenn replied from behind us, hiking his zipper back up, an accidental stain forming on his crotch, "Did you hear that too?"

"Yeah, what the fuck," Julia answered.

"Hrm, I reckon it's just a Boulder Eater," he said, his tone serious.

"What?"

"Boulder Eaters? Oh man, you don't know? They're fat and round like bears but have little front arms and giant back legs. They're said to stalk these woods, looking for people and animals, they can only eat with their fat tongues so they lick things and swallow." As he spoke we walked to catch up, Julia was hooked to every word, "The name Boulder Eater is a little misleading. You see they don't eat the boulder themselves, they crush things with the boulder and liiiick the blood and guts off. Easier to swallow with no teeth."

Julia looked at me and saw me smirking and looked back to Glenn who was now breaking the facade. "Oh fuck you both," she groaned and broke free of my hand.

"Where'd you get that one?" I asked.

"My kids made it up, we camped here a few times and most nights we'd hear it. Got them to come up with a story, made a damn good one, hey? Most likely just some animal snuffling through the sticks and stuff."

We continued on for another fifteen minutes until we reached a massive cliff face. A flowing waterfall of beautiful blue water streamed down into the river that went on through the wilderness until we couldn't see the end of it. "This must be the spot, gang!" June cooed and took a picture of the waterfall. "Set up wherever, Frankie will be here soon." Glenn and June had personal tents, the two Brian's shared a tent and so did Julia and I. Glenn immediately started a campfire, using the remnants of some old camper's rocks.

"Good stuff," he said, proud of his work. Julia and I walked up the river, looking at the diving fish. As we walked we saw three identical signs, one toppled that read;

'STREAM IS END OF PROPERTY. NEVER CROSS STREAM.' Julia went to stand the toppled one and as she scooped it up her finger looped through a massive hole, blackened around the edges. "They let people hunt out here?"

I waved a hand, "Probably just drunks." As I helped her prop it up I looked off in the distance. The river split into two channels way down the line. The first channel kept going straight, but the second was much tighter and wormed its way past the property line. Something tall was in the distance, it looked like a totem pole. I blinked my eyes and I tried to get a better look but the more I tried the blurrier it seemed to get. We walked back to camp and were met with a frazzled Frankie, she was yelling to June about bringing a two person tent and now she'd have to sleep in the open.

Brian C chimed in, "Frankie, you sleep with Brian and I'll rest up outside?"

Frankie rolled her eyes, "I don't want to share with fucking P, no offense." P ju...

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