In this version, unlike the book, all five kids break the rules at some point. Charlie does so by drinking the fizzy lifting drinks. It nay have been Grandpa Joe's idea (fuck Grandpa Joe) but Charlie went along with it. Charlie redeems himself in the end by giving back the gobstopper but fuck that shit because the other kids were never even given the opportunity to redeem themselves. Mike Teevee stayed out of trouble the longest and therefore should have won.

Here's the real shower thought: would Bunnicula have murdered Violet after she turned in to a blueberry?

Might have been exactly what she needed. Wonka sent her to the juicing room, after all.

Fucking Grandpa Joe... Freeloading fucking dumb asshole

Is Wonka the inventor of the turbolift technology in star trek?

Mike teevee was also an insufferable douche of a child.

None of them should have gotten anything.

grandpa george would have never pulled that shit

It was always Wonka's plan to "fail" all the children. It was only then that the decision about the gobstopper was most meaningful.

None of the children knew Wonka wanted an heir. None were promised anything but a tour.

How did Mike Teevee fuck up again?

Also DYK food manufacturing was very secretive at the time. Doubly so for things like candy bars where your specialty was your really the entire product. Such was the basis for Charlie and the chocolate factory.

The oompa loompas should have been given the factory and company as a collective, so the workers that create the value can share in the profits and future control of new designs and decisions in general

The shrinky TV thingamabob

George is back in bed all day with the two grandmas, don't worry about George.

It was made in the 1970's. It could've drifted on some flower power magic to make the oompa loomoas great again

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

I have another puzzle for you

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-da-dee

If you are wise you'll listen to me

What do you get from a glut of TV?

A pain in the neck and an IQ of three

Why don't you try simply reading a book?

Or can you just not bear to look?

You'll get no... you'll get no... you'll get no commercials

Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-da

If you're not greedy, you will go far

You will live in happiness too

Like the Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do

None were promised anything but a tour.

and a lifetime supply of chocolate, iirc. but I think you're right about Wonka planning to fail the kids. he prolly didn't want a kid who'd just mindlessly do the tour without going a little crazy.

Slugworth talked with all the children. You can see Slugworth behind each one whispering in their ear after they won a golden ticket. Tevee even asked his mother what secrets they could sell to Slugworth. They all had the opportunity to be honest, but only Charlie did. Even Grampa Joe wanted to sell the gobstopper to Slugworth, but Charlie refused. That's why he won in the end.