having sex (perhaps just once?) doesn't equal not lonely, though.

No, I'm pretty sure that every man who has had sex at least once in their life turned out to be a top bloke

But can't top blokes be lonely?

They say it's lonely at the top, bloke.

Me in the >10% category.

Having a ton of sex doesn't equal not lonely either.

Like Barney from HIMYM, or Charlie Sheen in 2.5 men.

There is no male loneliness epidemic; there is a loneliness epidemic. They have been talking about it since at least 2020 and it predates the pandemic. Anyone calling it a male loneliness epidemic is absolutely engagement farming. The entire manosphere is a rage-bait-engagement-farming scam.

Not just engagement. Back when it was just a loneliness epidemic, there were talks of maybe bringing back third places, or changing society to help. Then it became a male epidemic, and suddenly it was someone else's problem, it's an individual issue, no need to make a cause of it.

To me, the Bubonic plague will always be "the epidemic", but COVID can still be called the pandemic since it happened all over the world at the same time, which makes it more pandemic than the Bubonic Plague

Edit: "didn't even read the greentext before I started yapping about something" award

This is actually a really fucking eye opening post, assuming they're not lying. I personally never thought there was a "virginity epidemic" among my peers, lol.

It seems like people have gotten less cliquey about virginity since then, so maybe it is a good lie?

So.. more men as bottoms?

I wanted to check if anon was lying, but the only recent numbers I found are on what looks like a website of a conservative think tank with a pronatalist/marriage ideological mission (a little creepy imo). It does reference a cdc survey that seems real as the data source but still a bit sus to me though too much effort to reproduce their work. I'm pretty sure it's anon's source of information since it also covers ages 22-34 and they chose that range deliberately:

We focus here on males and females ages 22-34 because this is the key window in which people tend to marry and start families

And the other numbers that I looked at seem to match up. If I'm being paranoid I'd wonder if anon is actually their intern doing social media propaganda campaigns.

20 and still virigin

In fact sex being used as the indicator is actually a clue to one of the largest contributors. There's a very wide reaching assumption that men should get most of their emotional support from their female partner. This is often very stressful to the female partner and is a fragile way to meet a basic need; if she gets sick or dies he's probably not far behind her. Men need to learn how to compliment and hug each other platonically. It's 2026 and it's for their own good ffs. I keep giving my male patients brochures for men's support groups and I really hope at least some of them are actually going.

TIL that the opposite of loneliness is having had sex

Assuming the numbers are similar in my country, my circle of friends is more unusual than I thought...

Soo in my group of friends and former classmates the situation is really bad.

Now we were a group of gamers. That didnt help to meet girls LOL. Also early porn consumption. I guess as early as 16 might have had an effect. The guys who dont have obvious flaws but get no women were into mangas early on.

My advice would be skip the porn and the fapping. Select hobbies that give you chances to meet women.

We could learn a lot from anon

The guys who dont have obvious flaws but get no women were into mangas early on.

Are we talking regular Mangas or adult ones? Because if it is regular Mangas, why is that stopping them from meeting people?

I agree with the hobbies, but I think you can probably still jack off.

There's a general loneliness epidemic, but there's a difference between men and women.

It seems so surreal to me that other men don’t hug each other, or tell their friends that they love them

Furry here, we do that stuff. It's pretty good, can recommend.

Also men used to do that a lot more, before the world wars.

If you listen to today’s 4chan, you’re an idiot.

We do it a lot more but it does exist in other places just less hug centric more a hand on a shoulder. Normally social groups and clubs. it requires older men that are not entirely Jaded to set the example. Unfortunately those guys mostly have passed at this point and most boomers don't have the cognitive bandwidth.

Wow, statistics sure do a great job of revealing numbers!

Eh idk, my experience with the "male loneliness epidemic" is:

It's not just about "sex" (which it seems like that's all EVERYONE can focus on, so I get it,) but also about deeper meaningful connections. Personally, I have a few FWB, I want to fall in love with someone again, though, tbf, the part of me that had the ability to do that could also be dead, kinda hard to tell tbh.

It's also about (again, for me) the fact that increasingly it seems that the ONLY places acceptable to meet a woman you have not yet talked to are:

A) Online dating services that sell your data, are designed not to give good matches because they want you to stay on the app, and charge a fee for the apps to even be useful, and they're all owned by one company.

B) The bar. That's it.

Well, as for A, I value my privacy, and don't enjoy paying money to have horrible experiences. I run GrapheneOS idek if tindr would run. I don't even have social media, I can't stand writing my own bio and don't take selfies, it's not a good option for anyone but doubly so for me. Also I'm not Tom Cruise (or whoever you're horny for just sub them in) level attractive and as such I have to rely on my personality, which isn't really text and picture based. As for B, I do still drink but not like I used to, and even if I did I can't afford to go out as much as I used to in this fucked economy, and tbh meeting drunk women doesn't seem like a good idea anymore, feels like it opens me up to problems I don't fucking need tbh.

So where does that leave me? Well, common advice is to:

"Have your friends set you up with someone." Ok great. None of them have any single friends, at least none that have expressed interest in being set up with me, or that I am interested in myself. So, either "pray," or I could actively make new friends just for the express purpose of finding out if they have hot friends that want me, if not, move to the next friend I can find and try again? Sounds like a bad plan to me. I don't have the social battery for all that honestly.

"Go to the gym," you mean the place women complain about being hit on the most? Sure, that'll help, "idfk how to use this giant machine and I know you just watched me look like a giant idiot, and I know you hate being asked here, but I saw you from across the yoga mat and thought you had a cool vibe, wanna go out some time?" That's setting yourself up for success right there lol.

"Find a hobby," yes because when I'm not at work or sleeping I simply stand and stare at a wall. OF COURSE I have hobbies, but not only do "women want to enjoy their hobbies without being approached" also my hobby is hiking local trails and taking pics of (mundane to you but to me,) neat animals like salamanders and snakes. Idk if you guys are aware of this, but women would rather meet a literal bear in the woods than a nerd with a camera, I used to talk to people on the trails but now I just give them a wide berth (unless they're dudes, dudes are chill). Also like the library, but I'm the only one under 70 (well, and above 18, lots of parents with kids but that doesn't help me lol), other than the cute librarian I have a crush on (but you're not supposed to ask them out while they're working either, and also if she says no it'll now be awkward every time I go cause I'll feel like a creep, so she'll never know).

The real solutions seem to be we need a third place that is acceptable to meet someone and ask them out politely and take no for an answer, or women would need to start asking men they like if it's unacceptable the other way around, or I need to become gay because as I said earlier guys are chill, you can talk to them anywhere. Unfortunately we're actively killing third places and the ones still alive women complain about being approached, women so rarely ask a guy out and I don't think it's becoming more common, and afaik I was born unlucky on the gayness.

And I mean, am I "lonely?" Idk. I have friends, FWBs, kitties, I've had abusive relationships worse than loneliness, so "no" I guess, but also yes insofar as "I haven't felt real love in about 15 years and it'd be pretty cool to feel that for someone again," and I'll guaranteed never find it if I don't start doing the secret solution: Just say fuck it, fuck you, and fuck what is socially acceptable, just start asking out ANY woman I see/like ANYWHERE, politely and take no for an answer of course, but anywhere. At my job, at her job, at the gym, in Aisle 10, on the trails, fuck it. If I don't it seems my only option is to pray to a god I've never believed in that a lady falls in front of me like goddamn Rufus in Dogma and she happens to like me, and I happen to like her lmao.

If only I knew earlier that the males are all suffering with virginity. I could be out there solving this thing one by one (I'm gay).

Sometimes I lightly punch my friends in the balls to thank them for being vulnerable around me.

As a men with almost a bromance with his best friend... Frrrrrr.

Like, let's not even go as far as a hug (for many it's simply uncomfortable, whether it's with a man or a woman; I only hug my mother and my sister, for example xd), but there are other forms of intimacy and emotional support that shouldn't be tied to gender.

I mean, words of affirmation, the simple act of crying openly or expressing fears, anxieties, feelings or emotions, or expressing love or affection (platonically, as many mistakenly associate an "I love you" with something exclusive to romantic relationships); even just staying near to each other or hanging out with each other is a huge help.

Romanticism is something overrated and the same goes for sex, and I say this as someone who is alloromantic and allosexual.

And of course, they're for sure a genuine and legitimate, and overall valid way of social and emotional interaction and intimacy, but not the only one or the best one for everyone.

You need to find a trail hiking group. You don’t need to change hobbies it sounds like. Try organizing a hike in your area and invite people to come along if you can’t find any. You’ll meet people quickly doing that.

Genuinely though the bar is at the floor for guys right now. If you are well groomed, friendly, and genuinely interested in learning about the specific woman you’re talking to then that alone would bump you up a lot of your potential matches. If you’re walking anywhere and the other person looks like they’re not trying to ignore your existence then you have better chances.

Try going shopping on the weekend; lots of woman are more willing to talk in stores and such when they’re not stressed out from work. If they hold eye contact with you in a friendly way then try saying hi and just chatting to get to know them a little and what they’re out and about for.

how do these numbers work? do they just ask and hope everyone tells the truth?

Sex, relationships, and loneliness are all distinct domains. There's important overlap to be sure. But they are not the same things. You can be a casanova and still be lonely. You can be stuck in a bad marriage and feel very lonely indeed.

I think a lot of modern people (regardless of gender identity) have problems making and keeping friends, too. Long-term friendships take work, sacrifice, and compromise. It's not just compatible interests and personalities.

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

I agree entirely. Anecdotally, dating has always been easier for me than building platonic relationships.
I think for dating the 'rules' are a lot more clear, so it's easier to figure out what works and what does not. I can be fairly straightforward when dating, whereas budding friendships from my perspective and experience require a very different approach.

A loneliness epidemic is literally the most obvious effect of capitalism/consumerism/individualism I would expect. But very few of the 'male loneliness epidemic' clan has anything to say about capitalism being the problem.

Maybe don't say fuck it all the time but if it feels like it might be a good idea.

I thought "male lonileness epidemic" meant how fucking hard it's to make friends as a guy/boymoder.

It takes extreme luck to join a friend group, and as soon as people get comfortable they start ranting about gay people or such.

Women are about as lonely as men.

The problem is that they’re human and exist in an anti-human environment.

You know who else are lonely? Animals in zoos.

It's a redirection. Capitalism demands a lot more from us than it did even 50 years go. That makes women, on average, more choosy and men tend to need to work harder to keep up if they want that happy relationship. We're just selecting for good capitalists because bad capitalists might have kids too, but they're more likely to repeat mistakes of their parents or die off. It's kinda how most people can trace their lineage to royalty, because they were the ones surviving and thriving, not the peasants.

If things get worse faster than we can address them, this trend will continue. Maintaining any kind of birthrate in a positive direction would require the people falling out of the system to support it too, which are now in the majority.

So you can't create conditions for the family makers when the losers have voting power. The family makers will always try, but there will be fewer of them, and the capitalistic pressure only creates more losers.

Those statistics seem to be AI hallucination.

Also, if you have one sexual intercourse encounter per year, you're not lonely? AND you could be pounding every week and still be lonely because the chemistry is not there, the love is vapid. People can just wank or pound for sexual release, but it doesn't solve loneliness. Hell, people are lonely in a household of 6 people. Why? Because everybody is doing their own thing, ambivalent of each other. Thus, they can be lonely.

didn’t even read the greentext before I started yapping about something

As is tradition.

The feeling of loneliness is likely the basis for "I missed you." Forlorning. And it's noticed during reflection, alone.

We grow up in schools, where we've known 60%+ (of our class) since 1st grade (or earlier), and now -- in adulthood, we're thrown into a world full of strangers, everyday strangers. Friends help, but it doesn't mend that community we had in our day-to-day school work.

They might not have friends. And even if they have friends, where's the love? Everybody is doing their own thing. Even a married man can feel loneliness, and if they do, it's good to start a conversation.

Yeah, can you imagine living in a house 24/7/365 with a glass wall full of strangers? And you feel like the last member of your species? Perhaps, we solved "what would you do if you were marooned on an island, alone (or with a strange female/male)?"

Capitalism demands a lot more from us than it did even 50 years go.

Because we've lost bargaining capacity for better living of everyone. When we go toe-to-toe for a pay raise (or simple, better working conditions), we're alone against a rich institution. Unions granted us more than we've accepted it had.

Fucking this right here. Do these people have any idea how living in a red state fucks with your ability to make friends?

Yes but probably not 7 times a day.

They didnt share their dirty stuff w me. But i noticed their regular collections in their rooms. Why thats stopping them from meeting girls? I guess weird expectations that noone matches irl. Not able to talk to girls irl w/o acting weird. Its just something anectotical i noticed for multiple guys not having had GFs in their 30s and trying to connect dots here since i know them since they were 16ish. Could also ne mangas are just symptoms i.e. fleeing into worlds because they couldnt manage the real thing.