Bro Just trust me. Do your own research and you'll find out I'm not shitt'n ya

I only lie about how I'm feeling, nothing else.

Ya shouldn't.
Trust me, ya really shouldn't.

You shouldn't. I'm just a dog normal person on the internet.

You definitely should not, I only give bad advice.

Well, I don't believe you! Quick, tell me where I should invest my entire life savings. Since I know you're lying, I'm sure to get rich off this.

There's no one place you should invest it. Keep some liquid, in a high-yield savings account, for emergencies. Put the bulk of it in a diversified stock portfolio. Add to the portfolio and the emergency account monthly, as well as investing in any available IRA or 401K up to at least the employer match.

I wouldn't shit you. You're my favorite turd!

However awful I might turn out to be for you, I'd still be better than a redditor.

I’m a disembodied head so you can trust me. You can trust me

Trust trust trust trust trust trust. You can/nt trust me. Trust is possible. Trust has existed before. You know.

Pfft. Nevermind. That's the most ridiculous thing I've heard all day, and I talk to myself. So a pretty low bar already.

Because I guarantee it!
Would I ever lie to you?

"If you want somebody you can trust, trust yourself" - Bob Dylan