Oh hot pocket…we cannot escape ourselves.

If I am able to chew it -- it isn't cold.

Life hack: Don't place it in the center of the turn table.

Because of the way the microwaves propagate in the oven, there are "hot spots" and "cold spots" inside. That's why there is a turn table so your food moves around and gets heated more evenly. But the center of the turn table always stays in the same spot.

The concept of entropy would favor the transfer of heat, it promotes movement and disorder. Entropy is your friend here and you're blaming it because you think it sounds cool, leave entropy alone!

More likely i heat it too much and burn my mouth on the lava food.

Mic tip #2:
Instead of cooking the food at 5MW for 0.0234 seconds consider turning down da powa and leaving it on for longer.

The rays don’t penetrate deep into the food and cooking it longer will let the outside warm the inside.

leaving it on for longer.

at this point you might as well use a real oven.

Life hack: Use an air fryer whenever you can instead of the microwave.

Heck, I use mine to toast bread now.

Yes

Power level 50% for 2x the time is a good place to start for those suffering this. I use 30% and 80% regularly as well. Sometimes 10% like for softening butter. Get gud.

It's still unpleasant even if I'm pointless and temporary. I'd rather be pointless and temporary with evenly heated food; it's going back in the microwave.

Just mash it up first. The hot bits will warm up the cold bits and vice versa. It's all going the same way. No mouthful makes it out alive anyway

No, because I don't put my plate in the middle.

There is a reason it spins.

I use this trick. Basically, Microwaves cook from the top, and heat needs time to go down. Additionally, microwaves can put a lot of power into the food, which can burn bits while keeping other bits stone cold. The only way around this is to reduce the power and cook for longer. Mixing as other people have noted is also somewhat effective.

Basically if you make a microwave oven take as long as a regular oven, it'll cook the food more evenly.

why don't they design microwaves so the center isn't a cold spot, tho

It's important knowledge for reheating leftovers. Reheating a plate of food for 30 seconds on high results in the outside being hot but the middle cold. Reheating for three minutes at 50% results in a perfectly heated meal.

It also helps prevent temperature-sensitive ingredients from overheating. Reheated pizza tends to be extremely greasy if you throw it in on high because the cheese breaks long before the crust gets warmed through, but the low cost of an extra minute or two will give you pizza that's nearly as good as when it was fresh.

Since I'm usually doing something else (cooking/prepping), I tend to just heat on high in stages. High for a minute or two with rest periods in between to allow the heat to penetrate. This way it's ready along with everything else without overcooking.

Physics : it's stationary waves

I nuke it until there's some exploded around the walls and then forget about it for an hour or two. Then I just eat it luke warm.

Uh, yeah, it's Tuesday.

Most microwaves don't actually turn down the power; they just cycle on and off. So at 50% power, it's actually running full blast, but turning off every x seconds.

It's more effective to just pause and stir it half way.

Using power levels in tiers like that, and pausing to rotate 45 degrees (even if the tray already rotates, though not as necessary in that case) are the key. Also, moving the thing around inside to avoid hot spots.

But even then, for most things I'd rather spend 20+ min heating a thing in a conventional oven as it turns out better 100% of the time

Why don’t they make random orbital microwaves then?

They do, there's a spinning stirrer that disturbs the standing waves

No, not really, but I am hungry. If I leave it in longer, the outside will dry out and get tough before the inside gets warm. You can only heat-soak food so quickly. The right answer is to go back in time, set it for 60% duty cycle, and cook it for 150% of the original time