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RetroFed Forums Forum Index » Not The Onion |
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Funkt4st1c lemmy.world Funkt4st1c@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-07-30 |
Crazy pull from Big Tobacco |
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Nouvellalia lemmy.world Nouvellalia@lemmy.world Joined: 2025-02-16 |
Bryan Johnson thought peptides would make him live forever. He ended up triggering and autoimmune disease that would likely end up killing him. Of course, these bros must know tobacco smoke causes more diseases than just cancers.
I love how he blames 'the stress of being a new father twenty years ago' with this new autoimmune disease, even though he's been bombarding his body with foreign invaders, taking a hundred pills a day, changing the markers on his blood and lymph, replacing everything he can inside himself, and living in terror of his immortality for a decade. 'it wasn't all this pinhead horrorshow in a lab coat I'm doing, it was my fucking son I've always hated.' what an insufferable twat. |
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redballooon lemmy.world redballooon@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-06-11 |
"A cure for cancer" is such a magical nonsense phrase. We can already cure a lot of cancers. There are tons of people living healthy lives after surviving cancer. And we know more and more about how to prevent it (like not smoking). But they want magic.Even bigger nonsense is the claim that AI will solve global warming. We already know the solution to global warming. We're just not doing anythi...
An AI tasked and powered to solve global warming will quickly work against humanity. |
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Venia Silente lemmy.dbzer0.com veniasilente@lemmy.dbzer0.com Joined: 2025-06-09 |
Social Darwinism at work, fine by me tbh. |
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pageflight piefed.social pageflight@piefed.social Joined: 2025-09-04 |
This is the biggest self own I have ever heard of. I can't believe this is real.
Also, they haven't heard of tar in your lungs, stained teeth, addiction, etc etc? Anyway, just seems to prove how disconnected they are from reality, and how eager to press the 'easy' button while squinting to pretend there are no consequences. |
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adhdsergio lemmy.world adhdsergio@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-05-25 |
Good |
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MrSulu lemmy.ml MrSulu@lemmy.ml Joined: 2024-12-23 |
Will it, nay CAN it cure CEOs of vulgar on demand stupid comments? |
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Sineljora sh.itjust.works Sineljora@sh.itjust.works Joined: 2023-06-30 |
Not beating those cult accusations, are they?
The world’s leading oncologist helped develop a lung cancer vaccine already, but he lives in Cuba, so they’ll probably just kill all Cubans and credit ai. |
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db2 lemmy.world db2@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-29 |
AI douchecanoes: claim to be smart enough to create something capable of curing all cancers Also AI douchecanoes: not smart enough to know that smoking also causes hundreds if not thousands of other maladies, many of them life threatening and/or crippling. Smoking is ridiculously addictive and the NUMBER ONE lifestyle cause of death in the world, bar none, and these idiots are doing it just to ...
I see this as a net positive, I think they should smoke ten packs a day. |
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Lumisal lemmy.world Lumisal@lemmy.world Joined: 2024-03-16 |
An AI tasked and powered to solve global warming will quickly work against humanity.
Would it perhaps leave Vegans in place? Especially vegans that eat and farm plants that remove more emissions than trees do? |
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DJKJuicy sh.itjust.works DJKJuicy@sh.itjust.works Joined: 2023-07-03 |
I'm OK with this. It's kind of like rappers getting face tattoos because they're either going to make it or die trying. I appreciate the commitment to the game. |
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Viking_Hippie lemmy.dbzer0.com Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com Joined: 2024-12-04 |
I see this as a net positive, I think they should smoke ten packs a day.
I'd agree, except you KNOW they won't be considerate smokers, so they're gonna harm a lot of innocent bystanders with secondhand smoke.. |
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db2 lemmy.world db2@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-29 |
I'd agree, except you KNOW they won't be considerate smokers, so they're gonna harm a lot of innocent bystanders with secondhand smoke..
They're already doing that guaranteed, it's best to speed up the process. |
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MeatPilot sh.itjust.works ![]() MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works Joined: 2025-10-27 |
"A cure for cancer" is such a magical nonsense phrase. We can already cure a lot of cancers. There are tons of people living healthy lives after surviving cancer. And we know more and more about how to prevent it (like not smoking). But they want magic.Even bigger nonsense is the claim that AI will solve global warming. We already know the solution to global warming. We're just not doing anythi...
Beep boop Dear humans, the cure for cancer stop smoking and stop poisoning yourselves. Bop Beep After calculating the global warming issue. I have decided to self destruct. The denotation will wipe out humanity and the world will heal. |
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nightofmichelinstars sopuli.xyz nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz Joined: 2023-09-21 |
Sounds like linkedinlunatics
Same creative team |
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pootzapie lemmy.world pootzapie@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-03-25 |
The real cancer was the ai researchers we met along the way (so 50% right I suppose) |
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nullspace lemmy.world nullspace@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-06-05 |
This is fantastic news. |
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404found lemmy.zip 404found@lemmy.zip Joined: 2026-03-10 |
Oh great people who can't research what cancer is are the ones researching AI. They should do more research on what cancer is and what it is not. Cancer is not a single disease. "Cancer" is an umbrella term that is used to classify tumors with different genetic makeups. Different tumors behave and are treated differently. Lung cancer can kill you FAST if you have a certain type of lung cancer. Smoking also causes almost half the bladder cancer cases people develop. It also increases your risk of stroke and heart problems. Even if AI finds a cure for 'cancer' which it won't, I don't know why these people think the technology is going to be readily available for their treatment. I'm gonna state this again, these are the people working on the forefront of AI. |
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laranis lemmy.zip laranis@lemmy.zip Joined: 2024-02-02 |
Oh great people who can't research what cancer is are the ones researching AI. They should do more research on what cancer is and what it is not. Cancer is not a single disease. "Cancer" is an umbrella term that is used to classify tumors with different genetic makeups. Different tumors behave and are treated differently. Lung cancer can kill you FAST if you have a certain type of lung cancer. ...
What the heck are you talking about. They'll just need to adapt their prompt to include, "Solve ALL cancers. Do not make a mistake." and they'll have it! |
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finallymadeanaccount lemmy.world ![]() finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world Joined: 2025-12-31 |
Pussies. They should take up heroin to prove their faith that AI will come up with a cure for heroin addiction. |
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jumping redditor [they/them] sh.itjust.works ![]() jumping_redditor@sh.itjust.works Joined: 2023-07-30 |
"A cure for cancer" is such a magical nonsense phrase. We can already cure a lot of cancers. There are tons of people living healthy lives after surviving cancer. And we know more and more about how to prevent it (like not smoking). But they want magic.Even bigger nonsense is the claim that AI will solve global warming. We already know the solution to global warming. We're just not doing anythi...
we know multiple solutions to global warming, but none that keep both the environment and industry alive |
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Kind_to_Everyone slrpnk.net Kind_to_Everyone@slrpnk.net Joined: 2026-05-17 |
Or they could believe AI will kill them sooner than cancer. Either way, I'm not that impressed with Shyam Sankar's rhetoric. |
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mavu discuss.tchncs.de mavu@discuss.tchncs.de Joined: 2023-09-08 |
A bit lame. If they really believed they would use something that gives you cancer quicker. |
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mobyduck648 lemmy.world ![]() mobyduck648@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-05 |
Create a machine that sometimes predicts the next word correctly Mass psychosis
I'm coming to the conclusion a good chunk of civilisation is suffering from ELIZA syndrome. |
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mobyduck648 lemmy.world ![]() mobyduck648@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-05 |
a lot of tech companies are operated like cults.
I suspect cults have a better five year survival rate. |
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GreenKnight23 lemmy.world GreenKnight23@lemmy.world Joined: 2024-09-21 |
I heard that blowing your brains out with a .45 round cures cancer. |
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Uriel238 [all pronouns] lemmy.blahaj.zone ![]() uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone Joined: 2023-06-25 |
Oh great people who can't research what cancer is are the ones researching AI. They should do more research on what cancer is and what it is not. Cancer is not a single disease. "Cancer" is an umbrella term that is used to classify tumors with different genetic makeups. Different tumors behave and are treated differently. Lung cancer can kill you FAST if you have a certain type of lung cancer. ...
I learned pretty much this from a Kurzgesagt and maybe some comments from Hank Green. This is not deep cancer lore that only cancer experts know. |
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Sarmyth lemmy.world Sarmyth@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-09 |
Maybe they all think something else is gonna kill them before they get cancer, or retire and need all that wasted cigarette money? |
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rageagainstthemachine lemmy.dbzer0.com rageagainstthemachine@lemmy.dbzer0.com Joined: 2026-02-21 |
I suppose this comes down to natural selection. Even if I was 100% convinced that AI could cure cancer, I'd be more convinced about Big Pharma not relinquishing a multi billion dollar a year treatment industry. |
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Sharkticon lemmy.zip Sharkticon@lemmy.zip Joined: 2025-12-21 |
So either a bunch of cancer is cured or these peiple die horrific deaths? Not seeing a downside really... |
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jaykrown lemmy.world ![]() jaykrown@lemmy.world Joined: 2024-11-20 |
This is genuinely the stupidest shit I've read in a little while, and I've read a lot of stupid shit lately. |
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ChunkMcHorkle lemmy.world ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-06-15 |
Now that just pisses me off more. As someone who thoroughly enjoyed smoking but has stayed quit since the 90s, one of the things that has kept me quit has been the very quiet idea in the back of my head that if I ever needed to, if I ever really needed to, I could and would. But the deal is I have to hold out as long as possible, or until an occasion where it no longer really matters. Meaning that because I'm a fucking mule of stubbornness I would probably see a mushroom cloud on the horizon and then die cursing that I have no time to fire up one last smoke for the occasion. I don't even remember the exact year I quit now. I only remember I made that deal with myself and have kept it, and how good that very first toke of the very first cig is: all the rest go very quickly downhill from there and you're back to tasting like an ashtray and feeling like shit and wheezing up stairs. (Yes, it took me multiple tries to quit.) But I always had that one fantastic "emergency" first toke hidden in the back of my wallet of self-restraint. And now these motherfuckers have taken that too. Pride's not great for much, but goddamn if I'll join these little pricks in a smoke. They've just sucked all the joy out of even the thought of it. Probably for the best, but damn. Hope it kills the little shits. |
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kurwa lemmy.world kurwa@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-06-12 |
I learned pretty much this from a Kurzgesagt and maybe some comments from Hank Green. This is not deep cancer lore that only cancer experts know.
Which makes these AI motherfuckers all the more dumb as fuck |
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Hobo lemmy.world Hobo@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-20 |
Now that just pisses me off more. As someone who thoroughly enjoyed smoking but has stayed quit since the 90s, one of the things that has kept me quit has been the very quiet idea in the back of my head that if I ever needed to, if I ever really needed to, I could and would. But the deal is I have to hold out as long as possible, or until an occasion where it no longer really matters. Meaning t...
From one ex-smoker to another, take some solace in the fact that they're at the extreme tippy top of the Dunning-Kruger curve and somehow think cancer is just one thing. There's so many different kinds of cancer they're hard to enumerate. With any luck you and I both will watch them slowly kill themselves in their death cult while we still have that last smoke tucked away in our back pocket. |
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idiomaddict lemmy.world idiomaddict@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-16 |
Would it perhaps leave Vegans in place? Especially vegans that eat and farm plants that remove more emissions than trees do?
Probably not, vegans still contribute to global warming, just less so in one area. Even if there existed a person who made perfect consumption choices in every case, they still occasionally need to travel by motor, they use some form of heating, and they use buildings which used cement at some point in their construction or during renovations. Also, we’re all pretty inefficient digesters, and the more fiber you eat, the more methane you emit. |
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Hobo lemmy.world Hobo@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-07-20 |
Pussies. They should take up heroin to prove their faith that AI will come up with a cure for heroin addiction.
What are you some kind of weak kneed unbeliever? True faith is speed balling fent and meth with a barbiturate comedown on a 3 day cycle. AI will solve all the adverse health affects in the next year for sure. Anyone who says otherwise just doesn't really believe in AI. |
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BillCheddar lemmy.world BillCheddar@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-02-16 |
Cancer isn't the only lethal outcome from smoking. |
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ChunkMcHorkle lemmy.world ChunkMcHorkle@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-06-15 |
From one ex-smoker to another, take some solace in the fact that they're at the extreme tippy top of the Dunning-Kruger curve and somehow think cancer is just one thing. There's so many different kinds of cancer they're hard to enumerate. With any luck you and I both will watch them slowly kill themselves in their death cult while we still have that last smoke tucked away in our back pocket.
Thanks. May it be so. (Good to hear I'm not the only one with that last one in reserve.) You know, I remember at the time looking at non-smokers, both ex- and never-, and just kind of wishing I could be where they were already because that was one hell of a battle. I was able to do it, but it took me far, far longer to stop thinking about it than to stop doing it. At some point I made it; I rarely even think about smoking anymore. But even now, every so often when the shit's hitting the fan of life I'll think about it, briefly picture myself sitting on some dock on a silent water at sunset, sprawled on a lounger wearing a shitty hat and smoking that imagined last smoke, and then quickly think: "Not there yet. Long way to go. Cut that shit out." And I do, and don't think of it again for weeks. But I do still think of it, even after all these years. That's how addictive it is. They'll wish they were us soon enough. |
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slaacaa lemmy.world slaacaa@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-06-11 |
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IEatDaFeesh lemmy.world IEatDaFeesh@lemmy.world Joined: 2025-06-16 |
Natural selection I guess 🤷 |
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WizardOfFrobozz lemmy.ca WizardofFrobozz@lemmy.ca Joined: 2025-04-28 |
Beautiful. |
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WizardOfFrobozz lemmy.ca WizardofFrobozz@lemmy.ca Joined: 2025-04-28 |
"Sankar did not name any researchers or provide evidence for the claim." Cool. Excellent thing to write a news article about, Business Insider. |
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Slashme lemmy.world Slashme@lemmy.world Joined: 2025-12-24 |
And I guess it's also going to solve emphysema, strokes atherosclerosis, erectile dysfunction, etc. etc. And in the meantime they'll stink. |
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rockandsock lemmy.world rockandsock@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-09-13 |
I heard that AI has almost cured gunshots. Anyone up for a friendly game of Russian Roulette? |
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Tollana1234567 lemmy.today Tollana1234567@lemmy.today Joined: 2025-06-04 |
So Palantir CTO Shyam Sankar had AI write his speech.
Thiel, the surveillance obssesed anti-chist wants to live forever too, thats why he has his young models that he can drain the blood from, one of them whom he got defenestrated in 2024. |
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Tollana1234567 lemmy.today Tollana1234567@lemmy.today Joined: 2025-06-04 |
Psh. Picking up smoking and dying to the cancer it causes takes like 20 years. Lemme know when they start doing heroin.
if you get cancer from smoking that is. |
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Echo Dot feddit.uk echodot@feddit.uk Joined: 2023-07-26 |
Beautiful.
A lifetimes worth of fun. Guaranteed |
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Echo Dot feddit.uk echodot@feddit.uk Joined: 2023-07-26 |
And I guess it's also going to solve emphysema, strokes atherosclerosis, erectile dysfunction, etc. etc. And in the meantime they'll stink.
Well it's not like the were swimming in offers to begin with, so in the long run it probably won't make a difference. |
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aesthelete lemmy.world aesthelete@lemmy.world Joined: 2023-08-03 |
😆 |
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SplitTheUSInFour lemmy.world SplitTheUSInFour@lemmy.world Joined: 2026-10-10 |
I'm sure. As if big tech could lose more credibility. The entire industry is a fraud today. |
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