There's no way that's ever coming out looking like the picture.

The promise vs the reality of fascism

Don’t the children love Five Nights at Freddie’s? Tell them it’s one of those

I want to see the person who thought to mass produce this device operate it in front of me

@The_Picard_Maneuver #AltText4You #alttext A meme reads "Accidentally gave my kid trauma for breakfast this morning." Left: a Funny Side Up egg mold box showing a cute dog face made from eggs. Right: the actual pan result, a deformed, creepy egg face with burnt edges and a broken yolk. The contrast is the joke.

@The_Picard_Maneuver No alttext, no boost 🤷

Five nights at fried eggs

28 minutes later

If it's teflon coated, maybe pretty close. You'd need to cook the bacon separately, cut it to shape and place it on top. And, probably the whites to yolk ratio would need to be controlled. Just cracking two eggs and hoping for the best likely wouldn't work.

Also, don't use teflon coated pans.

ZWILLING Spirit Ceramic non-stick pans are my jam. Can't recommend them enough.

I wonder if it's an ai designed product

FurrySide up

Looks like they covered the pan and had the heat way too high. Although I doubt it would have worked anyways lol

K...ill... me... Ed...ward...

I Have Egg Mouth, and Must Scream.

This is how real humor looks like? Whoa, I'm totally dull now.

Why not use teflon pans? genuine question

They are constantly shedding Teflon into your food, even if you baby them with the softest possible utensils (which you need to do anyways to have them last more than a week). When people talk about microplastics in your blood/brain, this is one of the more common sources.

The field of understanding the impacts of having plastic in your body is still evolving, so there's little conclusive proof that it's bad for you. But there's definitely no proof that it's good for you either.

Also, if they ever get overheated, they can release toxic gases into the air, and given that most home kitchens are poorly ventilated at best, it's not good.

On top of all that, as mentioned, they're practically disposable dishware because the PTFE layer loses its nonstick properties pretty rapidly under any amount of regular use.

I literally said it out loud when I saw the pic. I had no control of it whatsoever.

You have humor in your blood. Be proud. 👐

I find the picture unsettling too

Works better than the other way around

These things never do.

Childhood exists for cartoon horrors made edible.

My understanding is that it isn't the Teflon itself that's the problem, that reacts to basically nothing. It's the thing they use to get the Teflon to stick to the pan that comes off sometimes which is the problem.

PTFE breaks down when under sustained high heat, leading to fumes that can make you sick. PTFE chains are too long to get stuck in the body from my understanding. The main issue with PTFE pans is that producing PTFE creates a lot of toxic byproducts that are extremely damaging to the body

Come on, "bunny side up" was right there! And only a tiny difference in shape.

Omg is that what it reminded me of

Well thanks for the info, will try to keep it in mind when I buy another pan

It's more that PFAS waste streams, if left untreated, can pollute great swaths of land and water.

Teflon itself is incredibly inert and will pass through any digestive system fully intact. It's the PFAS you have to worry about, and that's only if you're ingesting or breathing it.

So, Teflon pans aren't hurting you directly. Just indirectly. Slowly. As it destroys farmland, crops, animals, and water sources all in the name of capitalism and the ability to make a product that is considered disposable instead of lasting forever.

How did you miss "Sunny Side Pup"??

What's a better pan to use? I've tried cast iron, but that became like a second job upkeeping the oil coating or whatever. Stainless steel stuck to everything and was impossible to clean. At that point I ran out of money for experiments, gave up, and accepted my microplastic brain fate with my $12 piece of shit Kmart pan that somehow performs better than the other two.

"Smoking kills."

I've used egg molds like this before, they can work, but only if you cook on a perfectly flat pan (or even better, on a flat top) and only if you cook low and slow

Even if it came out right, they're still slowly eating its face, which is kind of messed up

Ohhh that's good

It's giving me trauma too. Not to insult the persons cooking skills, but it just makes me so sad.

"Kill... me..."

I also wish my food looked like someone's most special bodypart or an animal.

Cast iron is way easier to maintain than the cast iron hardos make it seem. Most new cast iron is gonna come pre-seasoned, so all you really need to do is a light touch up whenever you clean the pan out: after washing with hot soapy water, stick the pan back on the stove over high heat for a couple minutes to dry it completely, then drizzle in a teaspoon or two of neutral oil, and spread it around into a super thin layer with a paper towel. Take it off the heat once it starts smoking. That's it.

I like carbon steel these days since they're a bit lighter than cast iron and easier to handle, and the maintenance is pretty much the same. And like with cast iron, you can easily find a $30 pan that will last a lifetime, if not multiple.

"Killl MEEEEE!" it screamed.

Carbon steel is pretty nice. It has similar characteristics as cast iron but weighs a lot less. Ceramic coated is good for when you’re cooking acidic foods. I use stainless for things like soup or oatmeal or pasta. Cast iron for eggs, pancakes, meats.
Got rid of all the Teflon coated stuff ages ago. Still have to get rid of all the black nylon cooking utensils (often made with recycled plastics of questionable origin).

Edit: a word

alas, it was already dead. and was cursed to roam this existence forever

Personally, I go cast iron if it's low acidity, stainless for acids and my sauce pot.

Cast iron does take a little patience, but it's really just an extra step of drying immediately after you wash it, and if necessary, a quick wipe with an oily paper towel. 20 extra seconds max. You can do the whole seasoning in the oven thing, but it isn't necessary.

That said, if you don't want to think about it, your best bet is maybe a ceramic pan - they still need to be babied like Teflon, but they'll last longer.

The one on the left was clearly not flipped at all. You can cook it on med-low one side only and put a lid over the pan to trap heat and cook the top surface.

Pan fried freddy

if it makes you feel better, the eggs were once a living creature

Well it is spooky month

Ed... Ward