Humans are only walking digestive tracts. From an evolutionary perspective, all other organs originated from a primitive gut and have only one purpose: to serve it.

(credits to /u/susieq0044@sh.itjust.works who phrased it so well in this post, even though i had the thought already years ago)

I'm not so sure about the claim all other organs originate from the gut. Reproductive organs aren't related to the digestive system. Broadly, life has one genetic goal, continue. If anything the digestive system exists in service of the reproductive system. Humans are a huge asterisk though. Since we're thinking meat we can opt out of the biological imperatives (survive, reproduce) entirely should we choose, so humans are more like a ghost driving a meat suit.

i mean... not really. if you can accept that humans are animals and animals, having evolved from a common ancestor, all share a common "x is just a walking y", that would have to be gonads. consider as a counter example, bugs that metamorphose into an adult form completely lacking intestines and even mouths. yet they retain their reproductive organs and die once they use them to reproduce. humans are just walking gonads with a bunch of supporting hardware attached.

ok how about this: the brain serves the muscles to perform more targeted movements, which serve the gut to collect food, which serves the gonads.

I had a funny thought that we are surrounded by bacteria and have bacteria flowing through us, so we are like walking shells: the shell is mostly sterile thanks to white blood cells and antibodies, but inside the shell there's bacteria, and outside the shell (which is covered by a thin layer of dead shell) there's bacteria.

Elongated fleshy donut.

Alan Watts called us tubes with an input and output. Paraphrased but yes.

As a microbiologist, I've always said we're spaceships for bacteria. This is almost the same thing as your shower thought since our digestive system is critically dependent on the microbiome to function

All living things are energy conversion devices.

We're not walking digestive systems, we're walking and eating reproductive systems.

And really, the digestive tract is only there so the reproductive system can function.

We fuck though.

Structurally reinforced meat tubes.

I got gas...trulated! In my blastopore!

Or... is the reproductive system there so the digestive system can replicate itself?

I mean, the digestive tracts gotta reproduce, u kno? You're just along for the ride, to guide yours to the next high compatibility digestive tract.

not reproductive tissue, and also nervous tissue. primitive animals only have ganglia, ganlions, or nerve nets as thier sole "Brain" reproductive come from something more basal, if you look at sponges.

if you want to go into protosomes and deuterosomes its gets wierder, and pseudoscoeolmates and acoelomates.

We’re also walking circulatory systems for that matter.

Ugly bags of mostly water

Yes, slightly more bacterial cells than human cells. I imagine some people are more alien microbe than others, though.

This guy fucks

It's all there so the DNA can make more DNA, if you're serious about reducing humans to their most meaningless components.

Speak for yourself!

not acknowledging the higher functions of humans as part of evolution and what we are is a tad psychopathic though no?

Humans are meat donuts.

The gut exists to supply nutrients to the gonads. The muscles to feed the gut and handle the gonads output. The nervous system to control it all. Consciousness of it all, in all it's utterly pointless glory, purely because apparently there's a dark sense of humour somehow buried in universal statistics.

The microbiome changes daily based on the day's diet, so we're all quite unique from this perspective. It's also more than just bacteria as there's also fungi, archae, and even some bacteriophages (viruses that infect specific bacteria) present!

Since I study microbiology, my comment was centered on this topic. Additionally, not acknowledging something isn't the same as rejecting it. Nonetheless, since the microbiome regulates a person's energy level, depression, and food cravings, it naturally causes changes in perspective and ability. Meaning you'll have trouble functioning at a basic level, let alone a higher level, if you don't take care of your microbiome. Since having an area of expertise is apparently psychotic, maybe try adjusting your diet to help improve this odd perspective, or just be sure to stay far away from any research facilities.

Came to say, we're fucking machines vs. the rest of mammalia. Our females are in heat 24/7 and the males are constantly hunting pussy. Seriously though, does any mammal come close? Bonobos I think?

My body is convinced my gut wasn't built right and has spent way too much time and energy (IBD) trying to fix it :(

But aren't the gonads also not real in this analogy, since gonads evolved (skipping some steps) from single celled asexual reproduction and horizontal gene transfer. So aren't you technically just your DNA?

There was an article in JIR a while back pointing out that all animals were just the reproductive stage of primordial ooze.

Username checks out.

There’s a YouTube video that places animals in two categories: ones who develop mouths first and ones who develop butthole first. We’re in the latter group.