Gargamel thought that introducing a woman would disrupt Smurf society. But it turns out Smurfs have two personality attributes: the one attached to their name and being very, very into dudes. It's lore. Look it up.

I love Donnie Darko!

I hear they will Smurf a Smurf right in the Smurf.

That's smurfin hot!

Dammit Donnie! Why you gotta get so smart on us!

Typical woman.

I have the weirdest Smurf-on right now.

Ugh I just smurfed all over myself.

Well, you can suck a fuck!

🎵Papa Smurf can I like yo ass?

Yeah lick my ass bitch! 🎶

I don't think about fucking my family, that's gross.

https://youtu.be/VGBrdr5Ghn8?is=LEym6pt5-QyIFsfW

No, see, Papa Smurf films the gangbang, and later on he beats off to the tape.

Imagine if there was Alphasmurf which claimed smurfette will make them gay

Tell me; Rivalarrival, how exactly does one 'suck a fuck'?

He really gets off to Smurf films.

Thank god they can't play games online, they'd be awful.

So, Genesis, only with extra misogyny?

Why are you wearing that silly human suit?

So you can jot that down Right now.

Did Gargamel make the other smurfs too? If not, then it's not really Genesis.

Genesis from the point where Adam already exists.

Why on earth would you think a village of topless, hardworking, fun-loving males would be disrupted or distracted by a female?

Smurf in my smurf while you smurf my smurf, then call me a smurfy-smurf, you smurfing smurf smurfer

That's an old old reference I was not existing to see today!

A talent agent sits at his desk. A group of four smurfs walk into his office: Papa, Smurfette two others, and a cat. But they aren't human. They are three inches tall, skin bright blue, wearing identical white trousers and floppy white hats.

The agent blinks. "Alright, what's the act?"
The Papa steps forward, pulls a tiny wooden flute out of his pocket, and starts playing a bouncy, cheerful tune. "Watch this!" he shouts.

Suddenly, Smurfete jumps into the air, does a triple backflip, and lands perfectly on Papa's shoulders. The two Smurfs start doing perfectly synchronized tap-dancing, their tiny white clogs clacking rhythmically on the agent's desk. Azrael, starts juggling three glowing, magical smurfberries using only its nose.

Then, things get really extreme.

Papa Smurf stops playing the flute and starts aggressively smurfing right in the middle of the desk. He smurfs all over the place! He smurfs to the left, he smurfs to the right, and then he smurfs right into the Smurfette's face. Smurfette looks shocked, but then she turns around and absolutely smurfs the other Smurfs! The Smurfs, not to be outdone, begin to smurf each other with total, reckless abandon.

It is absolute chaos. Smurf this, smurf that, smurfing up up up, and smurfing down down down. They are smurfing the curtains, they are smurfing the paperwork, and they even start smurfing the agent’s favorite coffee mug. The room is practically overflowing with pure, unadulterated smurfery. Gargamel would be absolutely horrified. It is the most intensely smurfed thing the agent has ever seen in his entire career.

Finally, they stop. They take a deep, synchronized bow. They wipe the remaining bits of smurf off their hats, smile warmly, and stand in a neat little line.
The talent agent sits there, completely stunned, wiping a stray drop of blue smurf from his glasses. He clears his throat and whispers, "My goodness... that is... quite an act. What do you call yourselves?"
The father smiles proudly, raises his hands to the sky, and says:

"The Aristosmurfs!"

If gargamel could create smurfs, why did he need to know the location of the smurf village?

Smurfette was not a "real smurf" until Papa Smurf cast his own spell (which also made her blond, for some reason).

When Sassette was created by Papa Smurf he used Gargamel's spell and then his own, replicating the same process.

That spell might be one of the true genius creations of Gargamel, but he was missing the "second half" of it.

Especially if there were never females before. They obviously don't procreate that way so why would they have any more interest in a female?

Ah, makes sense. Thanks!

Oh wow, that's Dark.

"Papa Smurf cast his own spell (which also made her blond, for some reason"

I don't think that makes it sound any better.

Check out Ram Ranch!

Yeah, those really smurf his smurf, if you know what I mean.