Yes please

It would be the most amazing massage!

For any humans curious about what that might feel like, try really cleaning your navel during your next shower.

Actually, please do that regardless. You can thank me later.

You fool. Now that you've put this into the universe it'll end up as a romance novel and my wife will read it. You've doomed us all.

On the bright side, it might get her to power wash the patio.

🎶 If I were a slab of concrete
I'd never have to cry anymore 🎶

Could write a whole song around that

i want to know if there's a specific pressure that will cut hair but not skin. Or what's the maximum pressure human skin can handle,

want to be power washed.

This is where my mind went, too. Hell, she probably needs moisturizing more than Cassandra and a power wash might be just the thing!

edit: Needs, not breeds

Imagine how clean your pores would feel. Makes me want to try a waterpick on my face.

Don't.

You remember how the waterpik floss attachment head had a little warning to never use past intensity setting '1' taped around it that the other attachments didn't?

Your face pores would have even less protection as the entries aren't curved like where the teeth and gum line meet.

Hydraulic pressure injuries are not a fun way for physics and biology to interact, even when it's just water.

This is a strange Craigslist ad

"Would you still love me if I were a slab of concrete?"