Why is "water" on there twice?

You mean four times.

American beer is like sex in a canoe —
Fucking close to water

Who owns Miller?

What's the similitudes between a couple having sex in a canoe and american beer?

I thought saying "twice" was more likely to start an argument. They all suck.

Coors sucks the most, though.

Troll level: tree-fiddy

There are four waters!

THEY'RE BOTH FUCKING CLOSE TO WATER

That was before we started making microbrews. We've still got a way to go, but some of them are quite pleasant now. I had an oatmeal stout made out near Sacramento that was delightful last year.

what a waste of shelf space.

meanwhile, wow, pyramid apricot is so good.

Ding Ding! We have a winner 🏆 😁

This is an extreme understatement. Microbreweries started popping up in the US in the 80s. I would argue that these days, the US makes the best beers.

I googled beer brewing competition and this was the top result https://www.worldbeercup.org/winners/award-winners/

Notice it's completely dominated by US breweries. Now, I'm no expert, but it seems like a legit competition. I don't know how else to substantiate my position.

There's at least one more type: Piss.

Kidding aside, there are lots of good American beers. But the brands on the sign are not amongst them.

All I know about alcohol is that I like pinots, ports, porters and stouts, (well okay and Bordeauxs but those are expensive and if you don't like those you probably just don't like wine) and there's a local winery that does free tastings if you have a local zip code on your driver's license. Which is my way of saying I don't have the requisite knowledge to evaluate whether this is a legitimate international competition. All I know is the local German biergarten is the best bar in the, uh, what is the English word for 17 counties. Larger than region. Smaller than state. Superregion? Beyond their bier selection they have excellent sauerkraut and serve my favorite mustards.

I wonder why that might be the case.

The World Beer Cup® is brought to you by the Brewers Association

Click

Promoting and Protecting American Craft Brewers

Ah, the same reason why American teams dominate the NFL.

If you'll look at this Britain based beer award, it seems as if British beer is the best (and Japanese for some reason). Not a single one from the US.

But obviously, Germany has the best brewers, as you can see from these awards results, that (for no particular reason) are hosted by Germans.

I guess, the Bordeaux-thing is also more of a location bias. Here in Germany I can get Bordeaux for 4€ a litre and I'm pretty sure that is not a very good wine. But if you're from Minnesota, the Bordeaux you can get there will probably be of higher quality because it makes no sense to transport a 4€ wine all around the world to sell it for 9€, if you can get a cheap wine from California instead. If you incur the whole effort, you do much rather do it with a better, more expensive wine for a higher profit margin. People won't pay 5€ shipping cost for a 4€ product, but they are willing to pay 5€ shipping for a 30€ product.

For the same reason, you won't find a lot of cheap Californian wine in France: If cheap is the goal, the cheap local product will suffice.

oh, minnesota goddam is a nina simone reference i'm from near napa