I feel seen. Been with my partner for over 10 years and I feel the same way as the dad in this text exchange.

We typically have no idea unless explicitly told, no.

Even then, maybe she's just nice. Or canadian

A lot of the time we do know, but we're terrified of getting it wrong and getting rejected and maybe worse.

I was at some fast food joint with a buddy and his girlfriend, and after ordering my friend's girlfriend told me the cashier was so flirting with me.

Me and my friend: What? She was? How so?

It is unclear whether my wife liked me, but she does make it clear when she does not. Kinda like a cat.

I knew a nice Canadian that had a crush on me once. I still messed it up.

after being rejected 100 times in a row for "ew gross i don't associate disabled people" when after a couple dates i let them see me take a blood pressure pill (hadn't even let them see any of my massive collection of scars except my arm and face, which i can't exactly hide without michael jacksoning) you kind of just start making fairly accurate assumptions about the women in your society

A girl told me in 8th grade that she knew I liked her, and was cool with it. I thought she was nice for not being creeped out that I liked her, until one day on college when I finally realized what she meant.

Well, don't leave us bros hanging! What did she mean?

What did she meant?!

Yeah, see, my girlfriend just right out told me. But we're both AuADHD. So you know, things happen impulsively and directly.

I asked her on a date, she said yes. We get to the date we have fun, we have a long night out, she goes home and texts me "I like you."

Yep. Which is a good thing too because I liked her and was a lot nervous about that.

Wouldn't be better to do it on the first date?

The only way a person can definitely know what’s going on in your head is by telling them with your words.

Dad might be anxious though, lol. “I do” usually means informed consent 😂

You've obviously never been married

Nah I don't trust it, she was just being nice cuz it's her job

No, but in a close-to-a-decade LTR. We’ve got by so far lol

Hahahahahahahaha hahahahaha.

That's one of those easy things for me to overshare. I take half a dozen pills daily to function. If they aren't, or at least don't know why I take them, it ain't gonna work.

The actual like, really disabling thing about me isn't any of the things I'm treated for. It's my sleep disorder. I still have to show up to my 9-5. My kid still has arrival and pickup times at school. Banks are only open 9-5.

I've found that women with treated or untreated disabilities understand this shit way more than normies. That's not to say go look for them, but don't try to fit into an ablist mask, that's far more harmful

there are better ways to vet potential dates

don’t try to fit into an ablist mask, that’s far more harmful

it took me so so long to learn that one

Hahahaja

I have only ever been able to tell when it was someone I did not want to have a crush on me, someone I was definitely not interested in. If it was a woman I was interested in, or even someone not on my radar but that I probably would’ve seen how things went had I known she was interested in me, I have not figured it out until years later, if ever. My now-wife had to come right out and tell me she was interested. I would not be surprised to find out there were people I’d completely missed hints from decades ago.

!remindme 3years

Your buddies girl was the one flirting with you.

https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw

A girl in college told me she liked me when we were in high school, took me like two days to realize what she meant...

I tell my husband I love him 18000 times a day, and incessantly compliment him. Been there for thick and thin. I definately compliment him wayyy more than he compliments me.

"if they didnt want to be there they wouldnt be"

how the hell do you stay in a realtionship, married for that matter, if you dont know your partner likes you?

This feels like "haha men stupid" and I dont like it.

Did you just laugh with a spanish accent? Nice

Unfortunately I've very definitely had this problem many times in my life. I really don't like to assume someone's interested in me unless it's far beyond obvious.

That she might be down to clown if the circus is in town, but our boy left her hanging around at the dog pound

This feels like "haha men stupid" and this is why I like it

EDIT: Are the MRAs upset, and missing all of the men in this thread saying "lol literally me"?

She's just being polite.

Aside from a lot of guys being thickheaded and not seeing it, there's also selection bias.

A) A girl has a crush on a guy. He notices but plays it safe. Maybe she's just friendly. Result: no harm done except perpetuating the myth that guys don't notice.

B) A girl is just friendly but the guy thinks he's being crushed on and acts on it. Now he's forever labeled as a creep.

The only safe play as a guy is always, always assuming she's just being friendly. Unless she comes right out and says she wants to hump your bones, just assume she's being nice to you.

Hope.

It's putting all responsibility on others. Like, honey, use your words. Communicate. Don't expect people to read your mind. If you set the expectation that you want people to guess how you're feeling, then you'll have to deal with the fallout of some wrong guesses. It's easier to just make yourself clear.

Thanks for lining it out so well.

There's a good shot that she's into me, but if she's not, I'll either die of embarrassment or I'll get bullied by their whole social circle.

Add to this that men usually are not as socially comfortable as women, and you kinda understand it why this happens.

Anxiety and mixed signals?

"If they loved me, they wouldn't have done xyz. Right?"

If you want to know why men with basic decency are so oblivious, head on over to the womens stuff community and see how many posts boil down to "all men are rapists". I'm friends with several real life women, and most of them hold that same opinion and have damn good reasons for it ("Except you glitch, you're one of the good ones"). More than one have expressed to me that they hate being straight because they've never dated a man who hasn't taken advantage of them.

So yeah, I'm not making a move on a lady, well mostly because I'm gay, but even if I wasn't I wouldn't unless she explicitly asked for it. (I'd also have to run it by my boyfriend, and ask if she wanted a threesome with us, but that's another topic.)

Only on the fourth ejaculation, which implies the person can fully pass as a native English speaker, but if they get too excited (or drunk) the Spanish slips in.

When women can't communicate and frustrate themselves.

Well don't leave us hanging! What did she mean?

She lived in a refrigerator.

Communication from everyone involved would do wonders!

It's clear that when they say they liked you in high school, it means that they don't like you any more, and you blew your one shot. Don't be a dick and try now, that ship has sailed.

I used to own a retail shop, and I had one young woman assistant who had a sixth sense about those things. I'd wait on a customer, and after they left, my assistant would say"Wow, she really had the hots for you," and I'd always be like WTF are you talking about?

Been there. Not blaming women either, men are equally ableist.

It’s always good to play it safe unless evidence is so overwhelming that she’s into you. This has cost me some romantic opportunities but has also kept me from being the guy who dates all his female friends.

Even if we're explicitly told the first twenty times we'll just think she's being nice.

That's cool