I'd appreciate it if you could refrain from spying on me please and thank you

Sent from under my void snoring on my chest

:3 <3

Now do 3am!

Me and Beri rn

This is rage bait for sure. My dogs will happily snore cuddled in bed all day. My cat is demanding food at all hours even though he gets fed at exactly 8am and 5pm every day. We call the noise he makes machine gun meows because they are fast, loud, and relentless. The spray bottle lives on my bedside so I can get some sleep.

Kitty 🥰 Also did you take this photo during his meow attack?

I'm a cat person who appreciates dogs, and this is spot on. Cats may demand food, but you can wait out a tantrum.

The fear of having to potentially clean up an accidental means I'm up no matter what if the dogs are waking me up. I don't like cleaning up these messes, and the dogs actively look like they feel bad watching me do it. We're all having a bad time.

I'd much rather have a sleepy, half-hearted argument with my cats than worry I'm depriving one of the dogs of going outside if they're having an emergency. Apples to oranges.

Cats will watch you clean like you're their butler

Your dog doesn't poop?

Get an auto feeder for your cat.

"You missed a spot."

The vitamin D?

The vitamin D, right? 🙁

With my cats, whenever they do something bad I just say "no!" And I go and pick them up and put them somewhere else. Eventually they learn and when you say no they just stop whatever they're doing and go do something else. Works better than training with fear, imo.

I also have dry food available for my cats at all times and I only portion wet food. That's stopped them from asking for food during the night. Probably not a good tip for households that also have dogs, however.

So nowadays I rarely get woken up. When I do it's either because I haven't played enough with them or because of some accident like tipping over something or whatever.

Was about to say: the cat wouldn't be resting by the side of the human, its butt would be right on the face! 🤣

Cats may demand food, but you can wait out a tantrum.

YMMV. I had a cat who would start meowing at 5 am and would then destroy furniture and doors while meowing if the humans tried to "wait it out". Cats can have wildly different personalities and perseverance. Some are ready to meow the entire day and shit on your bed if ignored.

On the other hand, one of my dogs had stomach issues and got diarrhea while I was at work, and when I checked the cameras, she paced for hours trying not to have an accident inside. Meanwhile my cats would shit next to their toilet if it wasn't clean enough.

My dog let's me sleep in lol, all the cats I know wake their owners up.

rofl

My dog is making me do it, aaaahhh

"I appreciate dogs BUT I've imagined the worst dog and an idealized cat for my examples"

If I don't wake up at 6 to let my dog out, he just....waits. If I'm stuck at work an extra couple hours, I don't fear finding crap on the floor because dogs can hold it

My cat starts screaming for breakfast at 6am.

As of yesterday, it's 5am now

I can sleep in like 5 extra hours before my dog gets up off his couch about it.

Joke is on you… in San Diego, at 6 am, it is never snowing.

My adorable elderly cat Buttons starts asking for food between 3-5:30am depending entirely on the roll of some arcane dice only she can see.

I could theoretically ignore her sad little meows while she purrs very loudly, going she won't throw up soon after (if not fed) due to her lifetime of sinus issues and constant goopy buildup or just grumble while carrying her down to her food.

So far she's won every single such decision.

Yeah, they're not birds. They don't just go the instant they get the urge to lol

*5am god damn I'm tired

She keeps my heart unbearably warm 💓

I have basically the same training technique. I have one cat that doesn't eat all their wet food immediate. When the others have tried to jump in, that no makes them freeze, then lift and remove without pets or other recognition, eventually they stop trying.

Cats aren't untrainable but they aren't dogs so it requires different techniques and expectations.

For keeping the dry food away from dogs, I keep their free feeders in the cat trees but that means getting the ones that have a large enough middle platform.

I also feed them at night because they can't make me going to sleep. They will make mad dashes to the area where they get wet food if they think I'm going to bed.

No way, our dogs happily sleep in especially if the weather sucks.

Dookie. You take it with you in a little plastic bag.

Yeah, no. If you read my post, I was referencing dogs having an emergency (diarrhea, if I need to clarify further) and needing to go out. This isn't an imaginary situation, and every dog owner I know has experienced having to clean up a mess because their well trained dog simply couldn't hold it. It's not a criticism, as anyone with stomach issues that doesn't have access to a bathroom would have an accident, too. Cats rarely have this issue, because they have an indoor bathroom.

I don't know why you took my post as idealizing cats and criticizing dogs, but that's absolutely not the point of what I said.

Jokes on you cat people, Iike snow.

My dog likes to sleep in. She will poke her head out of the covers at 7:30am, watch me get up and then go back to snoring.

At 06:00, my cat is taking a massive shite in his box to make room for 07:00 breakfast. The smell of the little bastard's handiwork makes the wallpaper peel. I love him but would love him more if he'd learn to use the toilet.

Dogs ask for attention. Cats give attention.

Shouldn't it be 7 am? Given it was 6 am before and we popped an hour ahead, the same time of day would be 7 am. Or has DST addled my mind?

My dog goes out at like 10. This meme isn't even remotely true lol.

My cat literally never needs me to take it outside. Checkmate

I don't know if your schedule supports this, but you might have better luck feeding him smaller meals more frequently! My vet said that the "ideal" schedule would be like 10 small meals a day since that would mimic how they eat in the wild but that's pretty unrealistic for basically everyone unless you get an automatic feeder. And then they will just cuddle with the feeder instead of you lol.

Yea but the cat is running back and forth and climbing up your headboard at 2 AM

You might find the stink less terrible if you can convince him to eat different food. I foster, so I meet a lot of cats, and have found that avoiding fishy foods and high carb foods (kibble) really helps make their poops less stinky.

I also have a different type of litter in the box in my bedroom because I've noticed that my cats don't mind peeing in that litter, but will only poop in it if it's the only box available.

And I'm still sleeping through it.

I had a cat who woke me up at 4am for breakfast. He adopted me and my wife, so he arrived with that peculiarity. This was before we got an automatic food dispenser. I miss that little guy every time I'm awake before 5am.

What's odd is he eats the same food as my other cat, but his contributions to the household are far more foul.

Just like humans, some of them are more sensitive to certain ingredients than others. One of mine can eat a wide variety of foods with no noticable issues, while the other gets soft, stinky poops any time I offer just a little variety.

I tried this among many other techniques. He just simply doesn't care and will continue screaming until he is fed. It probably doesn't help I rescued him when he was 1.5 years old and had been from an abusive house. He was skinny, covered in scratches/scabs and shaved in a few spots with stitches. I was told he had to compete for food with other cats and the owner was abusive. 10 years later he's still a little cunt about food and afraid of women and anyone wearing shoes.

I had an automatic feeder, he knocked it over a few times and broke it to get to the food. Didn't bother again.

Poor kitty :( yeah, that explains the food issues. Sucks that even so many years later he's still like that.