...Étoile de mer

So much game, she not even playin'. You're not supposed to rizz that hard, to give everyone else a chance.

I don't know why. But this reminded me of the time I wore an orange shirt to home depot by mistake; spent 10 minutes helping a girl I thought was hitting on me. Realized about 5 minutes in she thought I worked there.

The toilet of the sea?!

2 things can be true at the same time!

If that would work generally , I would be covered in chicks. It attracted the right ones though... happily married.

Snorfl! Thanks for the laugh man 😁 ❤️!

Dayum, how many languages do you speak?

Relevant Mitchell and Webb butler sketch:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1DW1giVv3x4

I'd fall.

All the people in the comments saying 'this would work on me'

Brief eye contact and a light arm touch would work on you.

One of my first jobs out of highschool was a retail job that required a lot of customer interactions (specialty store). I worked there through most of college and now, literally decades later, I still find I have to restrain myself from helping other shoppers who have that "I need help" look.
The best for me was about 5 years after I had moved on from the job, I was in a similar specialty store buying something, and one of the customers that I used to help all the time at my old job saw me. She recognized me and her face lit up like she had been saved. She came over and asked me about something that, thankfully, I knew a fair bit about. And then I spent the next 15 minutes helping her out. When she had everything sorted out I walked to the register with her and we got in line to check out. After she checked out, I put my two small items I've been holding on the counter and the employee rang up my purchase. The person I had been helping watched me get out my wallet and start paying for the items, got a very perplexed look on her face, and asked me "wait, don't you work here?" I shook my head and the look of absolute mortification that crossed her face made me both want to laugh my ass off and give her a hug and console her at the same time. She was like, "I thought you were just waiting to help me put this in the car!". I told her I was going to help her put it in the car, I just need to buy my stuff first. She was so embarrassed, I wasn't even wearing anything like the store employees, she was like "I thought you were a manager now!". I told her nope, I don't even work retail anymore. When she asked why he didn't say something to her to let her know, I told her that I knew what she was asking about, and that she was one of the really nice customers that I enjoyed helping at the old job, so I helped because I wanted to.

and what's wrong with that!

This is how you can 100% guarantee that I like you.

As a friend.

My girlfriend once asked me how I knew she liked me when we first met. I told her it was because she would lightly touch my arm when we were talking. She said she didn't remember doing that, and also that she didn't actually like me when we first met.

That's hilarious, you activated a faux meet-cute and turned it real.

It's happened to me several times that other shoppers have come up to me in a store to ask where such-and-such is, which I didn't know the answers to 🤷‍♀️. I have never even worked retail before. (Food service, yes, retail, no.) I think maybe just walking with purpose gives off a vibe? I walk with purpose because I want to just buy what I need and get out 😂

You are not alone, sharkfucker..

Edit: i mean, the strategy, not the shark fucking

...Étoile du fromage

Sure dude

https://news.ku.edu/news/article/2014/06/03/flirting-hard-detect-study-finds

TL;Dr not only is everyone's definition of flirting different, coin flips are better than humans at detecting when someone is flirting

I like how it starts as a random trivia fact and somehow turns into a completely different train of thought. That’s a very real kind of mental jump.

Don't forget occasionally telling me I'm not a giant piece of shit:
https://youtube.com/shorts/cZRCELXf8QU

All I'm getting is I should start flipping a coin when I'm suspicious someone is flirting with me. Bonus points is it'll make me look mysterious.

Chainsaw man is pretty good

Sounds...fishy!