"stuck living this dreadful life."

The real Eeyore would grab the gun and shoot himself, not willing to rely on Pooh.

But maybe that was the real Eeyore because he knew saying that would get him killed.

"Some things ya just gotta do yourself"

"There's only one way to be certain, Pooh. Shoot us both and be done with it."

He's actually emoting fear, so unlikely. Also, the real Eeyore wouldn't bleed as he's full of stuffing.

The real Eeyore wouldn't bleed either, so Pooh was really using those thinking skills

This exact event is stolen from somewhere but I can't think of it

Edit: nvm maybe this IS the point of origin for this joke. My only other guess was Sad Larry from cyanide and happiness but that wasn't the same

Remember to always support your depresso friends (with life).

Eeyore's not suicidal, he just wouldn't mind if he died

Based