Sounds like this person just won the lottery. Apparently some people absolutely need to see the person that they are talking to, but I personally hate when my job has meetings and we have to have our cameras on. I don't need to see you. Just say what needs said or show whatever on your screen and then let's move on with the day.

I don't know how to not be this person.

Everybody else is wrong. A meeting is for back and forth communication. If they didn't want a meeting, they shouldn't have scheduled a meeting. Just write a memo or something. Everybody has far too many meetings anyways, and you're an asshole if you waste everybody's time on extra meetings that aren't even meetings.

During our last meeting (where inexplicably 25 people where called to talk), my direct manager had to take a shit. He told my colleague who was sitting opposite of me to excuse him, should he be called while on the toilet (the order was random).

Unsurprisingly, just as he had left, it was his turn. Despite being muted and had no video on, everyone heard me laugh because it was so loud my colleague’s mic picked it up.

100% agree with this.

If you don't want feedback, make your shit meeting an email. Otherwise it's a self-aggrandizement ego soothing cheerleading session.

Yeah seriously, body communication is still communication, this host just doesn’t want negative feedback.

Say smarter things if you want more positive responses.

I've taken to putting clear tape or a little vaseline on the lense.

Everyone sees me, but the image is imperfect. I just say there's something wrong with my camera.

I'm slowly making it worse, so they get used to bad/no image.

Had a manager once who told everyone to turn on their cams so he would "know that they were paying full attention." Heaven forbid you treat your team like professionals instead of 3rd graders!

Gonna get an email from IT saying they are sending you an external camera to use because the boss can't peep at you.

The private slack channel I was in with others who had my role would always point out when I started looking angry and annoyed. Heh heh. I hated meetings at that company.

I think you should leave

Do the same thing to that camera

And then they will request it back to inspect it. You really can't win, best thing is to just do some wild makeup that is distracting. Maybe some black eyes and gashes. It's none of their damn business what I do on my own time.

Sounds like they don't want this person in the conversation, if they don't want to hear them, see them or know what they think.

They ask to inspect it, take the tape off and give it to them. They hand it back, put the tape back on.

Weird, it only happens on my computer....

Maybe miming that "jerkoff" motion while rolling your eyes was a bit much

I don't mind screen on, but I'm unapologetic in the vibes I give off

I work from home and look like a homeless person during the week. I only shave before the monthly on camera meeting.

Inviting only people who support and agree with you to a meeting seems like a great way to run a company.

We're all trying to find the guy who did this

Found my new email tag line

Is the best part of, no it’s the only real reason, for in person meetings

How bad can it be?

Whelp, if you can see what I'm thinking on my face, I guess I might as well say it out loud.

It depends on what the meeting is. There are situations where you might not agree with decisions being made, but undermining your superior infront of business partners is not ok.

Those are the kinds of problems you handle privately. Not in a meeting with other people from other companies.

I just watched this GQ interview with Sacha Baron Cohen where he says:

In the real world, real people perform like bad actors. Like soap actors.

Very light sandpaper, like 320. Just a couple of passes.

It will make the glass grainy, and there is no real evidence you did anything.

Yet, you are forced to work with these kind of people.

Forced is a key word: we are cattle.

I'd call the solution men going their own way, if the Incels didn't do it first.

If you want my opinion, be prepared to get criticized if whatever you presenting sucks ass. If you don't want it, stop inviting me to meetings and send an email. It's really not that hard.

While I agree, I also think most such meetings can be held between those superiors just fine

That was a great interview, now I think that I need to watch his movies I didn't on the ground of not liking Ali G. Maybe even Ali G, too

Yeah where I work some of the managers get really upset if you criticise them even if their ideas and stupid. If you go on Glassdoor look the company up everyone complains about it so it's pretty bad.

When they have these meetings to "discuss" an idea really what they want to do is just have an audience to announce it to. I always claim to be busy so I never attend these meetings anymore.

Yep and now you are committed to something you didn't want to be committed to because you couldn't say anything in the meeting.

I mean in fairness I'm often not listening, but that's only in "could have been an email" style meetings.

I just let my two cats in the room sonce they can be relied upon to present their backside to the camera.

You always talk before a meeting to decide what is going to be decided in the meeting.

"Could you please wank your ego somewhere else? That would be nice. Thank you."

It's also such a neurotypical thing to (want to) force people to have the camera on.

Some people work better without at times.

Just let them work however they want and show trust, it might just benefit everyone. If I am not focused on showing an expectation of a facial expression I can focus on the topic.

The Expert

I don't use Zoom, Teams, etc. But I've seen quite a few posts that suggest people hosting the meetings have to ask others to mute themselves or turn off their cameras. Do the people hosting meetings not have the ability to mute the people joining them? Sounds like a no brainer to have that feature.

That is assuming you have sane environment and processes, which is a bold assumption for a lot of people

every single video conference application I've used has these features

they are always self explanatory and easy to use too

Sacha Baron Cohen was before his time. I still don't know how Da Ali G Show got made. His interview with Newt Gingrich was comedy gold.

Wouldn't you need to talk more before, if there is no sanity?

There might be questions asked. And then you need the appropriate head of department to answer it. That's why they're there while not being expected to say anything.

I've had to implement systems I did not like. Systems I thought were inferior to other methods. But when the decision is made, it's made. And when asked how we plan to implement it, I answer with the plan and the steps. I don't undermine us by expressing disapproval in the formal meeting.

It's called professionalism.

You were probably already committed to it long before the meeting started.

Time for objections and concerns have already passed

Lol, there have to know there's a problem, and I'm not telling them.

IT isn't that proactive - I would know, I'm part of it. We don't have time for stuff people do report - we're not going out looking for stuff.

That's just not how IT works.

You seem to expect the person you talk to would listen, it's not always the case, unfortunately