Carl Sagan said that you need a universe first.

Imagine the universe as a spherical cow.

What a strange question. What would be a better answer even, hands, nipples, what?

The only person who could be more smarmy in that regard than Neal deGrasse Tyson.

Physics would be a lot simpler if all cows were spherical

A bucket to catch the milk, maybe?

I have a bucket, but not a cow. Pretty sure someone with a cow but no bucket is closer to being ready to milk a cow than I am.

Right. The kid was saying the same thing, in a way. The question presupposed the existence of the cow. Making an apple pie "from scratch" presupposes the existence of apples. Both presuppose the existence of the universe.

Carl said this, in response to "from scratch", to make the broader point that we shouldn't assume the universe has always existed in its present state. Nothing smarmy about it. And, it worked very well. The quote is well-known 50 years later, the point is taken.

Neal, yeah, a smarmy egotist, no doubt.

You’re not wrong, and it wasn't really a knock against either of them.

It is being smarmy, because that’s not how people normally think or talk. IMO, Sagan has earned the right. Tyson has not.

I'd imagine milking them would be somewhat more complex though

And a stool.

Other than that, yeah, you need a cow.

Reminder that "smarmy" necessarily implies insincerity, not just a funny way of talking.

Nah, no stool needed (possible with a sitting technique)

And the cow could give you a big one if you are patient enough😂

The mouth is a small bucket so someone with a cow can milk it without issues.

PSA: don't drink raw milk, even if it's fresh and straight from the teat

Money or a gun to acquire the cow.

Me, an engineer: They aren't?

But if i was collecting supplies for milking I’d get the cow last. Once you get the cow moving around is a lot more difficult.

No, that was to bake a pie. He didn't say universe before cow.

Therefore, cow is infinite.

Yeah, that's why I prefer cubic cows. They're much easier to pack, too.

Not sure why I need nipples to milk a cow. As long as she has an udder I think it'll work either way.

Certainly easier to get a proper angle on 'em.

Obviously when discussing milking cows, we assume a spherical cow universe.

Efficiently packing 17 square cows.

Why not cow-shaped universe?

Asking for a friend.

You could use the bucket for other things while waiting for a cow to arrive

Like baking a cake from scratch, first you must start with creating the universe.

Because spheres make the calculations easier.

This is the Superwaffle Debacle all over again!

flips syrup table and leaves

This is a physics problem not a philosophy problem

How thick of a universe ༼ ͡⚆ل͜ ͡⚆༽

I can't believe we're having this argument again. Hexagonal cows when two dimensional. Uh, regular icosahedral cows in three, I don't know the names of the shapes in four but you'll put your eye out

Look when I get my titties out it makes the cows feel better

Spherical cows in a vacuum?

Solidarity smdh

I'm just going to use ready made universe powder

The will to abuse animals.

Well they didnt ask him, did they?

Who says there is a better answer? Pretty sure the kid was right.

That never bothers Neil deGrasse Tyson either

Oh boy

If you think milking a cow is abusing the cow, you must be the softest human being in the world.

You probably think petting a dog is abuse.

The laws of physics

I do not like this

Yes. But does it have to be your cow? And can you keep the milk? What does the calf say about that?

Captain Obvious: The Early Days

"Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?", am I right fellas?

Is the milk free if you have to work for it? ;)

I'm sure it's fiiine, lots of babies are doing it. They can't read your PSA anyway so it's all good :P