I really liked this graphic that I found here: https://www.thecoachingtoolscompany.com/think-acronym-for-kinder-and-more-effective-communications/

But it’s not the only source for the THINK acronym. This source claims it was created to reduce online bullying, but I believe the idea, and probably the acronym, have been around much longer than that.

Why YSK: we can all benefit from improving our communication skills, and this is one easy way to do that. I think a lot of us want to be kind, and this can help us better achieve that goal. It’s helped me a lot!

The one problem with this strategy is that it leaves the space full of people who don't follow this acronym to say a ton of shit.

Change has to start with someone.

That's not a problem with this strategy. There's always gonna be people around who talk a lot of shit, we can still try to improve ourselves and how we interact with others.

Anecdotally, it can be contagious.

I live in one of those most dangerous towns in my country. We have a Facebook group where people will proudly act really nasty toward each other.

One time someone was mean to me and it was unwarranted. I think anyone wouldn’t’ve blamed me if I called her out.

I can be nasty myself. A lot. ESPECIALLY if I’m being attacked. But I’m trying to work on it.

For whatever reason, in this situation I happened to remember that I’m trying to work on it. And as badly as I wanted to be the bigger bitch, I chose to be the bigger person and I chose to respond with kindness. And I felt like shit. And I felt mad that I wasn’t “defending” myself.

It caused a chain reaction that I’ve never seen in this town. People were hopping into the replies also offering kindness to this person.

This was awhile ago and I still feel great about it. Which is another benefit.

You’re way more likely to regret being mean than you are to regret being kind.

Could someone misinterpret what I am saying?

Well that's Lemmy fucked.

Tis it true m'lord?

Also anyone who learned to read with that dumbass method of not actually looking up words you don't know or using context clues and instead, taking a wild guess at what they mean.

There will always be people (some humans and many politicians) who actively leverage an advantage. They get power IF wider society doesn't follow these principles as best we can. In other words, a shitty world grows shittier people, leading to a shittier world. Break the cycle.

While this is good advice it only addresses the sender's perspective of communication. What's missing is how to deal with people who communicate with malicious intent. You'll wear yourself out quickly on social media if you don't learn how to protect yourself against that, and "THINK" is only half of the equation

Dont worry, you can still be intensely nasty to her out of nowhere. Just pop up like a jackinabox.

"Hey! You bike is getting stolen!"

Is it true - yes.
Is it helpful - to the owner, yes; to the thief, no.
Is it inspiring - no, not really.

Okay, let's stay silent.

It's just a joke, don't kill me.

This is pretty useless, mostly because assholes will never put effort into not being assholes.

Is the thief happier to have stolen the bike than Shen is sadder to lose it?

Then Hhw do you tell someone their bad idea is bad?

"Your bike is getting stolen" might be uninspiring, but talking about how uninspiring that example is is definitely uninspiring too. However, this comment talking about how uninspiring your comment was is also uninspiring. But if anybody calls me out on it, that would probably be uninspiring too.

Exactly. This is just toxic positivity bullshit if left incomplete like that. Context matters enough that this isn't always good advice whatsoever.

“Inspiring?”

Stfu unless you’re an influencer, I guess?

But what is pegging if not an asshole putting in the effort to be something more?

idk if it's just me but "think before you speak" just triggers me.

it's what my dad used to yell at me (and pepper with calling me an idiot) when I was 8 and he had no patience with my questions and he hated the way i think and am.

Idk, sometimes you gotta get right up in people's faces and be really annoying, make them think about stuff they don't want to, disrupt all that peace and harmony create tension and force them to confront internal contradictions. Be like a mosquito.

Or should I say, a gadfly.

I think there are some tough and impolite conversations worth having. It's the foundation of a healthy friendship. We're all learning how to be better people day by day.

It depends on how much you stretch the definition of inspiring. It may inspire the owner to chase after the thief.

I’m a pretty big asshole.

It’s also social skills, which, as an autistic person, isn’t my strength!

Can you give an example?

Don’t communicate with people with malicious intent.

Anti vaxxers on social media
Climate change deniers
Flat earthers
Nazi apologists
Genocide deniers
Homophobes
Transphobes
Anti-antifa
Election deniers

"Hey! You bike is getting stolen!"

Is it true - yes. Is it helpful - to the owner, yes; to the thief, no. Is it inspiring - no, not really.

Okay, let's stay silent.

It's just a joke, don't kill me.

Is it true ? No

Is it helpful ? I guess it’s the top comment so yes

Is it inspiring ? Well is it now nullify3112 ?

Is it necessary ? I would argue, is anything necessary?

Is it kind? Absolutely

Why did you just stand there while that brick chimney collapsed on top of that family?

I was trying to come up with something inspirational!!

Sometimes it's nice to have a bitch about someone who's annoyed you.

Helpful is the same as necessary and inspiring is the same as kind and true-kind-necessary is a more efficient and well known saying.

My personal saying to accompany it is

• Shoot for at least 2
• Don't say things that aren't at least 1
• If you ever think of something that's all three, never leave it unsaid.

And then you always miss your moment to contribute to the conversation (cue "you're always so quiet").