Always.

Nahhh

Be an American multinational company valued at 500 millions or more

First you define what "getting caught" means. Then, you just do only things that are not described as "getting caught". So easy!

Just get good

Don't do the thing. Or just wear a high vis and carry a Clip board m, click pen. A lanyard, hard hat. No one ever asks some one about nothing in high vis. Unless they ask you " why are you only wearing high vis" and "adam where are your pants?" . That's what the hard hat is there to solve.

First of all stay calm. And listen very carefully to this advice never and I mean never commit two different crimes at the same time m.

Don't be the slowest person running from the bear

By not posting on a public forum, criminal!

Keep your door locked or hang out a sign that says "no girls allowed" or "please knock first".

Step 1: Don't

get facial reconstruction surgery in Switzerland. Also, fresh cheese.

Only commit crimes where the worst case scenario is failure, but prison, torture or death are acceptable personal outcomes. When all that matters is that they can't undo what you've done, getting "caught" is just a formality.