It's like the gift guide knows me so well

Titties. That's the only gift any of us need.

buy that special guy in your life another pickup truck because his current pickup truck looks lonely

You have to go to Nevada to sell rent those legally.

The flannel is imbued with sandalwood scent....

I dunno about anyone else, but just hit me with a disposable trinket. Food and drink are fan favorite gifts because you're not compelled to house them any longer than it takes to consume them.

Or get them a Tungsten cube. Every man wants a Tungsten cube.

Wait, what? I thought that scent was Extreme Tiger Bear

That would be cool... And heavy too.

Oh man, you're totally right! Of course they'd use their trademark scent that includes hint-of-leather mixed in?!?

They're absurdly overpriced, but I wonder how quickly you'd make your money back if you bought a big one and had men pay a fee to mess with it for a few minutes.

That's last year's model. This year's model includes a beard.

But… I like sandalwood. Also sage and cedar (even tho I’m allergic to real cedar)

Can’t stand those whiskey, smoke, leather, etc “manly” smells.

Correction: soapy tiddies.

Something that you really want and is worth $1 but you can't buy for less than $20 is something you'll never buy for yourself. That's often a pretty good gift.

But where do I put my whiskey flavored knife?

Am man. Didn't realise before that I wanted a tungsten cube. Now I want one.

Coincidentally, my favorite cologne has notes of violet. And sandalwood...

SAME! Just find it funny that those are the limited selection of "manly" smells.

I prefer floral scents but my wife is allergic.

She's also allergic to whatever they use for a lot of the "manly" scents so I'm limited to whatever we discover she can be around without sneezing.

Love floral scents!

I bet the side of that flask has little holders for your cigars and beard trimmers too.

We need real manly scents like:

Drunk Tank

Pack-a-Day Smoker

Day Old Beer

Warm Energy Drink

And…

Aqua Velva

I hate that I’m such a stereotype; but I legitimately want this stuff lol.

and had men pay a fee to mess with it for a few minutes.

This sounds more sexual than I think you intended.

You forgot they season it with moss, musk, or some random type of wood. WTF do they think I am, a termite?

It's heavy, so they might get fatigued faster than they'd expect.

Use both hands!

It's reverse Excalibur. If you can get your sword into the cube, you become king.

It is imperative that the sword remains unharmed.

new role play with the partner invented. Fediverse exclusive

I would love a tungsten cube and I want think sheets of titanium so I can burn them because turns out titanium burns

What about other manly scents like:

Used engine oil

Grinder cut-off wheel

Varsol

Orange citrus mechanics soap

Tiger Balm

Heavy and hard!

You know how to man, man.

You can never go wrong buying a man a sword

I want one.

William Osman made the tungsten cube so expensive. It was like $2k when he did his video wrecking shit with it. Now they're asking $10k for the 3 inch cube.

I respect the hustle, but damn.

Still, the 1 cm model is like $50 and would still be absurdly heavy for its size, even if it only weighs 19¼ grams.

Might be worth it to find yourself a bunch of old incandescent lightbulbs and get the filaments out instead.

The sheer number of flammable metals out there is a little scary lol It's not that many, but it's more than most people realize.

Living in an oxygen-rich environment has its drawbacks lol

Everything will burn given enough oxidizer and heat!

I'm certain that all metals are flammable if you try hard enough, because all it takes is oxidation. Quite a number of them can burn in a self-sustaining manner in terrestrial conditions, though, mostly provided if and only if you manage to have enough surface area of the stuff available in one place. Powdering them usually works for that. Or, if you'd like to watch some iron burn, a fun science fact is that you can light a wad of regular old steel wool like the kind you'd buy at the grocery store as if it were a cotton ball. The finer sized the better, and you should probably also do this outside.

Metal flasks are such a stupid gift.

You want whiskey? Buy a god damned bottle. A flask holds A big pour of liquid. You're going to bring a drink somewhere? Good one, Bevis.

Sneaking it into something? Nope, it's metal and clunky big.

Metal conducts heat, so your bodyheat hot whiskey will burn the whole time, no matter how good it is.

Be an adult and buy a plastic nalgeen flask you keep in your sock. Does the place do pat-downs? Ok, then chug 8 oz of whiskey in the parking lot like god intended. They can't take it from you when it's in you already. ; )

fuck. A cube shaped hole just appeared in my life.

Used engine oil
Orange citrus mechanics soap

I kinda like these tbh. Like... I'd buy a shave soap that smelled like gojo.

Is ozone just oxidized oxygen? Hmm.

Yeah, I just send people my list of shit that I think I want but I'm on the fence about spending money on when they ask for gift ideas. Can't go wrong there. Certainly better than them going off script and trying to get something on their own based off what they think they know about my interests.

It's educational

~tiny dopamine thrill for understanding that reference~

Wombat turds are cube-shaped

Swap the Fast Orange with Zep Cherry Bomb and that hits way to close to home.

Let me introduce you to the epitome of "seriously?" :
Chiseled Face - Midnight Stag:

Scent is made of the following notes: Russian Leather, Motor Oil, Hoppes #9, Birch Tar, Oakmoss, Gasoline, Smoke, Cedar, Cade, Bergamot, Vanilla